Michael: What I meant was, what organization is giving you the award?
Lucille: Well, technically, it's from the Bluth-Austero Company.
Michael: Oh, I see. So you're giving it to yourself.
Lucille: Well, it's mostly from the Austero side.
Lindsay: Perfect timing for my campaign.
George Sr.: Our Lindsay.
Lucille: I've never been less ashamed of her. [gasps] Did I say what I think I said?

Narrator: But aside from a few setbacks, George Michael was enjoying a break from responsibility.
George Michael: For scenario two, you just found out that your Darth Vader figure is dating your girlfriend, and you find out he knew she was your Whatever. Who gives a shit? As usual, guys, just apply your own scenarios to these.
Narrator: Soon he, too, was teaching a course in a program of his own creation.
George Michael: Go left.
Narrator: He even inspired a certain move that would eventually appear two years later in a Han Solo origin picture.

Narrator: She had her mother mock a reporter who had a speech problem...
Lindsay: This so-called reporter from the Wee Guardian says I was right. Now, suddenly, she's [English accent] "Perhaps I've recalled incorrectly. I'm positively knackered." [cheering, laughing]

Maeby: So when my mom's giving the speech, we'll be in the background, and we're just going at it. [laughs] And I'm like, "Why have I never thought of that before?"
George Michael: Kind of feels like you have. To me, it seems like what you really want is for your mother to see you for who you are. Why don't you write a speech for her to say about you, about how lovely and smart you are, how you've blossomed as a young woman into this incredibly beautiful and special person that anyone would be lucky to get to share their life with.
Maeby: I think I see where you're going with this.
George Michael: An incredibly attractive, incredibly rare and precious gem.
Maeby: And then, I open my mouth, and I have these rotted out meth teeth. And I'm like, "Then why do I gotta [bleep] my cousin for some meth money, Mom?" You know, or something like that.
George Michael: I feel like we're circling it.
Maeby: Yeah.
George Michael: I don't know, maybe that's just a shade unnecessarily cruel.
Maeby: Well, at least I didn't punch her in the face.

Narrator: Where Michael's father currently had his own son in a panic.
George Sr.: No, I'm fine.
Michael: Yeah?
George Sr.: I'm fine. It's just, uh, I like, you know I just like the feeling of, uh [exhales] feeling something. It's just nice to have some control over one's life. But your mother is a wonderful person!
Michael: I've screamed the same thing many times I was worried she was in earshot.

Gob: Everyone gets a trophy, huh, Pop? When I was a kid, you said, "You want a trophy? Try harder, Gob."
George Sr.: Huh. Well, maybe I did something right, huh?
Gob: But I was like, "But you gave one to everybody else. What happened to everybody gets a trophy?" Because there was a little bit of that back then. It was getting started, but... Meanwhile, the guy who could've tried harder is now giving it to the not super young, obviously, but still fairly well known local TV host whose breasts - and you're gonna be surprised to hear this coming from me - may be a little bit too hard. [laughs] High class problem, huh, Mike? God, I really wish you you could get a feel on those next time, Mike. There is something not right with those.
Michael: Yeah, well, I'm in town such a short time, so next time.
Gob: Well [laughs] One less trophy, huh, Mom?

Maeby: You sure I didn't mention that in the text?
George Michael: Yeah. I read that thing down.
Maeby: Hmm.
George Michael: Should I go say hi to him? I haven't seen my Darth since I hit him.

Narrator: What Michael didn't know was that while the police had gotten ahold of Buster...
Buster: You think that's me?
Narrator: ...they were more concerned with a different missing person.
Buster: I mean, that guy obviously has a giant rubber hand, and I have a giant melted hand that smells like Bounce. [giggles]
Buster: [on laptop] I'm in the movie.
Buster: Okay, that's definitely me. I'm just surprised to see it, since I'm pretty sure I erased that video.
Cop: You sure you don't want an attorney?
Buster: No. Michael was very clear about that. I'm just a missing person.

Gob: I only remember the thing about Tony because of the "W," and his beard was a "W," which I thought, you know, for Wonder, was funny. You know, it tickled me. His beard tickled me.
Michael: Yeah.
Gob: [stammers] And is that part of what you look so confused about?
Michael: Well, it is sure on the list.

Lucille: [on the phone] So, you're unopposed and I need you.
Narrator: It was the first time Lindsay's mother had ever told her she needed her.
Lindsay: You said it. [line disconnects]
Lucille: I said it!
Narrator: Well, she read it.
[Tobias holds up a pad on which he's written "I need you"]