Harry: Oh, that's gotta hurt.
Sally: This is an incredible sport. These guys must be the best athletes on earth!
Harry: Well, they don't call it professional wrestling for nothing.

Dick: Do you think we live on the wrong side of the tracks?
Tommy: What are you talking about? The tracks are right over there.
Sally: Yeah, if we lived on the other side of them, we'd have to wait for the train to pass every time we went to the liquor store.

Mary: I've got so much to do. I hope I haven't left anything out.
Nina: Well, let's see. You've kissed butt, sucked up, fawned over and stroked them. A little wine and cheese and it's party time.

Dick: What is wrong with her?
Nina: She' climbing the social ladder.
Dick: The what? I'm sorry, Nina, I don't understand Ebonics.
Nina: No, you know, you try to fit in with a group of people by pretending you're just like them. You talk like them, you act like them until they think you're one of them. You know what that's like.
Dick: No! No, I don't! And neither does Tommy, Sally and Harry! No, we're not social climbers! We're humans!

Mr. St. Clair: I'll have a glass of merlot.
Dick: And I'll have a nice Hawaiian punch.
Mr. St. Clair: Don't believe we've met. Edgar St. Clair.
Dick: Don't believe we've met Edgar Allen Poe. But, um but I'm Dick Solomon.
Mr. St. Clair: And what do you do, Mr. Solomon?
Dick: I'm in... [refined accent] physics, Mr. St. Clair.
Mr. St. Clair: Physics, eh? You know, I always thought if I hadn't gone into business, I'd have done something in physics.
Dick: Yes, and if you had wheels, you'd be a bus. [chortles]
Mr. St. Clair: Actually, I own several bus lines.
Dick: Really? Then all you need is the chassis. [both chortle]

Sally: Singapore Sal, the iron maiden, circles her prey.
Harry: Her opponent, Handsome Harry, circles nervously, hoping to avoid yet another serious injury.

Mary: Dick, this is so exciting. The St. Clairs want to invite us to their club tomorrow night.
Dick: Tomorrow? I can't!
Mary: Well, why not?
Dick: Well, for openers, tomorrow is spaghetti and waffle night and the whole family is going mad with anticipation.
Mary: Can't you cancel?
Dick: And break their little hearts? No, Sally's already made the pesto syrup.

Sally: So you're saying that when a 300-pound soprano and a 250-pound tenor dress in funny costumes and take 15 minutes to die, that's art. But when the Grave Digger takes on the Caped Canadian, that's trash? I'm sorry, I don't get it.
Man: Well, my point is the cultural "histoire".
Sally: Oh, yeah, yeah, talk is cheap. Let's go outside and settle this thing.

Dick: [refined accent] Why do you call it "bacon"? You don't "bake" it, you fry it. Why the devil can't they call it "frycon"? Am I right, Eggie?
Mr. St. Clair: You know, I think he's on to something.

Dick: Surprise!
Mary: Oh, my God!
Dick: Now you have a TV on the ground floor.
Mary: That's the biggest TV I've ever seen. How did you afford this?
Dick: Well, I sold your grandmother's antique end tables.
Mary: What?
Dick: Actually, that only covered the down payment. You have 12 more monthly payments of $265.00. [turns TV on] Gunsmoke!