Jim: Meredith was the perfect choice to play the head of the company. Her lunch break lined up with our appointment with Danny and... That's it. That's really all we were looking for.

Meredith: Meredith Van Helsing. Pleased to meet you.
Jim: [watching on screen] Meredith Van Helsing?
Dwight K. Schrute: Van Helsing was a respected professor before he was a vampire killer.
Jim: Okay. But what is he more famous for?
Michael Scott: Shhh!

Kevin: I could sing it.
Andy: I just was hoping to maybe save your voice in case we did a novelty song about frogs.
Kevin: But my voice is unique. Like Bob Dylan.

Dwight K. Schrute: People can't keep their true natures hidden for long, and this guy is smoldering like a tire fire.
Michael Scott: Testify.
Jim: Okay, he's not that good-looking. I don't understand why everybody's obsessed with this-
Michael Scott: Yeah, he is that good-looking.
Dwight K. Schrute: He's very, very handsome.

Andy: Okay. Honest feedback time. Oscar?
Oscar: It's pandering. And it makes me think you think I'm stupid.
Andy: But do you think it could be famous? Like in a car commercial or something?
Pam: Not really. It's kinda weird that a grown man is singing from the point of view of a little girl.
Andy: I feel like I can see someone ice skating to it. You know, like in the Olympics.
Ryan: I- I don't think they usually skate to such bad songs.
Andy: Rude. And not helpful.
Creed: Well, I really, really, really liked it.
Andy: Well, that- That really bums me out.
Creed: You're welcome.

Oscar: Meredith, I-
Meredith: Oh, Manuel! This is Manuel, my cleaning man. He doesn't speak any English.
Danny: Hola. Que tal?
Oscar: Como estas, senor?
Meredith: Uh, Manuel, cleano el window.

Meredith: [to Ryan] This is Esteban, another cleaning man. He doesn't speak English either. Esteban, el flooro.

Michael Scott: I said stop. Okay, Danny, this is not Pennsylvania Solartech. This is Dunder-Mifflin Paper Company. This is Meredith Palmer-
Meredith: Please to meet you-
Michael Scott: Don't! Get away from him. Please, just leave. Get out of here. Go. Forever.
Danny: Hmm.
Michael Scott: I owe you a most sincere and humble apology. We were trying to watch you to see your sales technique, so we could stop losing so many clients to you.
Danny: But from where?
Michael Scott: A surveillance room next to this one.
Danny: Okay, so you set up this fake company, then you hired this homeless woman to impersonate an executive to spy on me so that you could copy my sales technique?
Michael Scott: Yes. And it's the sincerest form of flattery.
Danny: Or ... crazy.

Darryl: Song's about truth.
Kevin: Yeah.
Darryl: What's something you really care about?
Andy: Reverse snobbery.
Darryl: More universal.
Andy: Sometimes I feel like life has passed me by.

Dwight K. Schrute: How do I look?
Jim: Amazing. How do I look?
Dwight K. Schrute: Normal. Ugly.
Jim: Well, I do the best with what I've got. Let's go.
Dwight K. Schrute: Alright. Wait, wait, wait, wait for me! It's weird if I come in slightly after.