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‘Gay Witch Hunt’ Quotes Page 1 of 5    

The Office: Gay Witch Hunt

301. Gay Witch Hunt

Aired September 21, 2006

Michael outs Oscar to the entire office after he complained about his boss's inappropriate language.

Quote from Oscar

Oscar: I was going to quit, but Jan offered me a three-month, paid vacation and a company car. All I had to do was sign something saying I won't sue. Gil and I are going to Europe. Kids, sometimes it pays to be gay.

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Quote from Andy

Andy: Big Tuna is a super ambitious guy, you know, cut your throat to get ahead type of guy. But, I mean, I'm not threatened by him. I went to Cornell. You ever heard of it? I graduated in four years, I never studied once, I was drunk the whole time and I sang in the a cappella group Here Comes Treble.

Quote from Karen

Karen: Jim's nice enough. I don't know how well he's fitting in here. He's always looking at the camera, like this. What is that?

Quote from Stanley

Stanley: I got them a toaster. They called off the wedding and gave the toaster back to me. I tried to return the toaster to the store and they said they no longer sold that kind of toaster. So now my house has got two toasters.

Quote from Ryan

Ryan: Yeah, I'm not a temp anymore. I got Jim's old job, which means at my 10-year high school reunion, it will not say, "Ryan Howard is a temp. " It will say, "Ryan Howard is a junior sales associate at a mid-range paper supply firm." That'll show them.

Quote from Michael Scott

Michael Scott: We are not in the playground anymore. There are new rules. We have to be mature, but we can't lose the spirit of childlike wonder. What is love anyway? Maybe it's supposed to break all the rules. Like me and Jan. Or Oscar and some guy. Life is short. When two people find each other, what should stand in their way? I'm glad if today spurred social change. That's part of my job as regional manager. But, you know what, even if it didn't, at least we put this matter to bed. That's what she said. Or he said.

Quote from Dwight K. Schrute

Dwight K. Schrute: [wailing] Jim is gone. He's gone. I miss him so much. I cry myself to sleep. Jim! [normally] False. I do not miss him.

Quote from Jim

Jim: [on the phone] I can't say whether Dunder Mifflin paper is less flammable, sir, but I can assure you that it is certainly not more flammable.

Quote from Andy

Andy: Hey, Big Tuna, you're single, right?
Jim: Yeah, I am.
Andy: Pretty hot, huh? She's completely crazy. Steer clear, Big Tuna. Head for open waters.
Jim: Okay.
Andy: Okay.

Quote from Jim

Jim: I ate a tuna sandwich on my first day, so Andy started calling me Big Tuna. I don't think any of them actually know my real name.

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