TV Quotes

Darryl: I taught Mike some phrases to help with his interracial conversations. You know, stuff like, "Fleece it out." "Going mach five." "Dinkin flicka." You know, things us Negroes say. Oh, yeah, I taught him a handshake, too.

Pam: [on the phone] Michael, Carole Stills for you.
Michael Scott: Who?
Pam: Carole Stills.
Michael Scott: Do I know a Carole Stills?
Pam: Your realtor.
Michael Scott: Oh, yeah, put her through. Hey, Carole, how goes the real estate biz? Is it real good?
Pam: It's still me.
[aside to camera:]
Pam: Sometimes I don't put Michael through until he's already said something. I look at it as a practice run for him. He usually does better on the second attempt.

Michael Scott: Why are you here?
Dwight K. Schrute: When Darryl was coming, you said you wanted me here for protection.
Michael Scott: Not. I said, not that.
Darryl: We just have a lot of stuff down there that could be stolen.
Michael Scott: That's ironic.
Darryl: What?
Michael Scott: That you are afraid.
Darryl: Why? 'Cause I'm from the hood?
Michael Scott: Dinkin flicka.
Darryl: Dinkin flicka.

Pam: [on the phone] About 10 minutes ago. No, I didn't know what to say. Yes, I know. I don't know, Mom, he's my best friend. Yeah, he's great. Yeah, I think I am. [Jim walks in] Um, I have to go. I will. Listen, Jim...
[Jim kisses Pam. As he does so, she moves closer and holds her hands around his face.]

Jim: Excuse me. How long is the wait for a table for two?
Dwight K. Schrute: I would never, ever serve you. Not in a million, billion years.
Pam: It's a nice tux.
Dwight K. Schrute: I know. It belonged to my grandfather. He was buried in it, so family heirloom.

Michael Scott: Oh, and another fun thing. We, at the end of the night, are going to give the check to an actual group of Boy Scouts. Right, Toby? We're gonna-
Toby: Actually, I didn't think it was appropriate to invite children since it's... You know, there's gambling and alcohol, and it's in our dangerous warehouse and it's a school night. And, you know, Hooters is catering. You know, is that enough? Should I keep going?
Michael Scott: Why are you the way that you are? Honestly, every time I try to do something fun or exciting, you make it not that way. I hate so much about the things that you choose to be.

Kevin: We really don't do a lot of weddings. We actually don't play in public very often. We are all really hoping that Pam's wedding works out. This could be a turning point for the band.

Creed: Oh, I steal things all the time. It's just something I do. I stopped caring a long time ago. You should see how many supplies I've taken from this place. Honestly, I love stealing things.

Jim: Hey, how's it going?
Pam: Good, especially after I took all your money in poker.
Jim: Yeah. Hey, can I talk to you about something?
Pam: About when you want to give me more of your money?
Jim: No, I-
Pam: Did you wanna do that now? We can go inside. I'm feeling kind of good tonight.
Jim: I was just- I'm in love with you.
Pam: What?
Jim: I'm really sorry if that's weird for you to hear, but I needed you to hear it. Probably not good timing, I know that. I just-
Pam: What are you doing? What do you expect me to say to that?
Jim: I just needed you to know. Once.
Pam: Well, I, um- I- I can't.
Jim: Yeah.

Pam: You have no idea-
Jim: Don't do that.
Pam: what your friendship means to me.
Jim: Come on. I don't wanna do that. I wanna be more than that.
Pam: I can't. I'm really sorry if you misinterpreted things. It's probably my fault.
Jim: Not your fault. I'm sorry I misinterpreted our friendship.