Michael Scott: Guys, I'm scared. I'm really scared. I think I'm growing into a giant. Because look at this normal sized coffee cup. Looks so tiny in my giant hand now.

Phyllis: Michael, we have a lot of work to do.
Michael Scott: What?
Phyllis: Work.
Michael Scott: Ugh! God! What happened to you people? [robotic voice] We are just office drones. We are office drones. All we do is work... Is work.
[aside to camera:]
Pam: If you don't take out his battery, he just keeps going all day.
[back:]
Pam: Oh, no. Your battery fell out.
Michael Scott: [robotic voice, trailing off] I... was just learning... to... love.

Jim: There are other reasons to go to Ohio.
Pam: We're getting married today.
Jim: So, it turns out it's the closest place to get a marriage license without a 3 day waiting period.
Pam: Tell 'em how it happened.
Jim: Okay. So, we're going through all the wedding plans and, boy, it is complicated.
Pam: And very expensive.
Jim: Very expensive. Cause you say you want a small wedding and that's great but then you have to invite-
Pam: You can't leave anyone out.
Jim: No one.
Pam: Okay, just get to the good part.
Jim: Okay. Right. Oh, so this morning we are having breakfast together and I just looked up from my cereal and I said, " You know what I want to do today? I want to marry you."
Pam: I had just woken up. I didn't look cute. That's how I knew he meant it.

Michael Scott: Okay. I think that I have figured a way to get you guys out of your funk.
Pam: What?
Michael Scott: Funk is the problem and the solution.
Jim: That makes sense.

Michael Scott: I have taken my downstairs office and I have turned it into a place to hang out. A place where unattractive and attractive people can get together. To meet. To greet. To see the ones that you love. To love the ones that you see.
Oscar: Is this our punishment for not wanting to have lunch with you?
Michael Scott: Why don't you get over lunch, Oscar? Everybody else is past it.
Dwight K. Schrute: [As Jack Nicholson:] All work and no play makes Michael a dull boy.

Meredith: This is like a haunted coffeehouse thing?
Michael Scott: No. Dwight is confusing you. That- It's- It's more of a disco.
Andy: It's like a haunted disco.
Michael Scott: ... with coffee but without the haunted.
Phyllis: It's a combo dance house coffee bar.
Michael Scott: It is a daytime disco on the ground floor of an industrial office building.
Erin: It's a cafe disco.
Michael Scott: Exactly.
Kevin: So, like, a disco cafe?
Michael Scott: Wha- No. No. Not even close. I can't force you to go down but I can entice you. I'm gonna be down there. Erin will be down there from time to time... and all-you-can-eat espresso.

Michael Scott: Well, Kevin, I guess it is just me and you.
Kevin: Yeah.
Michael Scott: Holding down the fort.
Kevin: Yeah. This place is great.
Michael Scott: Thank you.
Angela: Oh, my God, Kevin. I am still on hold. You were supposed to get the answer from Michael and come back up.
Kevin: I'm sorry.
Michael Scott: This is a no work zone. Please respect the lei.
Kevin: Yeah. Respect the lei.

Angela: Come.
Michael Scott: Kevin, stay.
Angela: Kevin, come.
Michael Scott: Kevin, stay.
Angela: Kevin, come.
Michael Scott: Stay, stay.
Angela: Come on, right now.
Michael Scott: Cookie. Kevin, cookie.
Angela: Ugh. There is no cookie, Kevin.
Kevin: [to Michael] Is there a cookie?
Michael Scott: Mmm-hmm.
Angela: Wha-
Michael Scott: Come on.
Angela: Oh, for goodness sakes, Kevin. There's no cookie. There's no cookie. Come on. Come.
Kevin: I wanted a cookie.
Angela: Completely unacceptable.

Phyllis: Hi, Jessica. Is Bob in?
Jessica: Oh, he's on a call.
Phyllis: Oh, I'll just duck my head in.
Jessica: It's pretty important. He wouldn't want to be disturbed. Can I give him a message before he gets off?
Phyllis: Tell him I'm going dancing downstairs in the storage closet between the bathrooms that used to be a utility shower and he should join me there.
Jessica: I'll let him know.
Phyllis: Mmm-hmm.

Dwight K. Schrute: Hey! Hey, hey, hey! I got your text. Who's Philip?
Michael Scott: No. No. No.
Dwight K. Schrute: Who tipped you over? Was it Philip?
Phyllis: It's my back.