‘Bat Out of Heck’
Season 9, Episode 19 - Aired April 10, 2018
Frankie is relieved when her boss, Dr. Goodwin (Jack McBrayer), offers to buy all the peanut brittle that Brick is selling for school, but his sunny disposition disappears when the product isn't delivered quickly. As Axl prepares to trade in the Winnebago and buy a car, he is getting tired of Mike always telling him how to run his life. Meanwhile, Sue is determined to win a hotel scholarship, and Frankie swears she's seeing something flying about the house.
Quote from Sue
Sue: Okay, I'm still kind of processing this, but you are looking at the newest recipient of the Franklin Butterfield Hotels and Resorts Scholarship. I got it!
Frankie: Oh, my God! Are you kidding?!
Mike: [chuckling] Hey!
Frankie: Oh, Sue!
Mike: Wow! After all that?
Sue: Because of all that. He said that if I can stay that calm under pressure, I would be perfect for the hotel industry. Apparently, it's a stressful business. He also said that bats are surprisingly common in hotels. That seems disturbing, but I'm just gonna savor this victory.
Quote from Sue
Frankie: Oh, honey. We're so proud of you.
Mike: Yep, it wasn't easy, but you did it.
Sue: Yeah. Actually, Dad, I did it for you.
Mike: Me?
Sue: Yeah. I have always felt so terrible that you had to sell your diaper business to pay for my school. So I promised myself that, if there was ever a way I could pay you back, I would, so when that scholarship money comes in, it's yours. All $200 of it. Yeah. [hugs Mike]
Mike: Oh. Well. [quietly to Frankie] Does she have any idea how much college costs?
Frankie: [mouths] No.
Quote from Frankie
Frankie: [v.o.] So, it was a crazy night. But Dr. Goodwin was right. It was kind of nice to be out on the lawn on a warm spring evening with your family and your dentist boss. And, after about two hours, the bat left. 'Cause let's face it... nothing stays in our house by choice.
Quote from Mike
Frankie: Did you see that?
Mike: See what?
Frankie: I don't know. I just saw something.
Mike: Hmm. You're digging in a backpack looking for silverware, you're seeing things, you're wearing one slipper. You're this close to being that lady who wanders around the highway median.
Brick: Actually, she wears two slippers.
Quote from Frankie
Frankie: Hey! Here's my other slipper. What is this doing in here? [chuckles triumphantly] Who's crazy now, huh? You saw that, right?
Quote from Axl
Frankie: See? I knew I wasn't crazy. There's a bat in the house. Do something.
Axl: [to Mike] You're older and wiser and always will be. I will watch and learn.
Mike: There's a fishing net in the yard.
Quote from Mike
Frankie: Okay, you almost got him, Mike! Ooh, you missed him! No, you got him now. Get him! Ooh, you almost got him. Oh, you missed him!
Mike: I know I missed him! I don't need color commentary. How about a little help?!
Quote from Sue
Sue: [on video call] And that's why I think we should... [indistinct shouting] Uh, we should... I'm sorry, I don't know what I think we should. Uh, my mind is completely blank. Okay. Mr. Ackerman. I am so, so sorry. I wanted this scholarship so badly. You have no idea how badly. And the only reason I haven't given you my full attention is because, while I have been talking to you, I have been dealing with this. [indistinct shouting]
Dr. Goodwin: Die, you filthy varmint!
Quote from Brick
Axl: Um, now it's hanging on the breezeway screen. Now it's eating the cereal.
Brick: Right out of the box? Guess he couldn't find a spoon, either.