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Push It

‘Push It’

Season 10, Episode 21 - Aired April 26, 2023

Adam is finally in a great place in his relationship with Carmen, until he remembers he's set to move to New York. Meanwhile, Barry is outraged when he realizes his JTP companions have other friends beside him.

Quote from Beverly

Erica: Why are you so desperate to keep Carmen around?
Beverly: My tiny boy can't date New York City women. They wear high heels in the boardroom and the bedroom.
Erica: They really don't.
Beverly: Always dressed in black, with their bagels and progressive ideas about how suburban moms shouldn't cut in the bathroom line at a Broadway show.
Erica: Okay, I think I got enough. Good luck messing up Adam's love life. Bye, crazy lady.

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Quote from Barry

Barry: Now, how does one make friends?
Joanne: I guess you could make a list of the things you like and find people who share those interests.
Barry: Like the Asian battle arts.
Joanne: As a very early starting point that you ultimately realize was a misstep, sure.
Barry: [sighs] Damn it. That would never work. My natural instincts would kick in, and I would destroy any potential bestie with my elbows and feet.
Joanne: Here's an idea. Don't hurt anyone.
Barry: Or maybe this unnamed stranger would respect me more because, despite all we share, I wasn't afraid to pummel him to the edge of death.
Joanne: I don't feel like I'm helping.
Barry: And yet, you have. Here I go, off to brutalize my new best friends!

Quote from Mr. Glascott

Adult Adam: [v.o.] Meanwhile, my mom was busy entertaining pals at afternoon tea.
Mr. Glascott: Isn't tea time nice? And who doesn't love tiny sandwiches? [chuckles] I feel like Andre the Giant. Such a strong and impressive man with many health issues. The heart struggles to pump blood through a body that large.
Virginia Kremp: So, is it just us and John today?
Beverly: I'm afraid so.

Quote from Mr. Glascott

Beverly: This is insane. I've never overstepped in his romantic life.
Mr. Glascott: Uh...
Beverly: If anything, I've made his relationships better.
Mr. Glascott: [higher-pitched] Uh...
Beverly: Instead of yelling at me, he should be drowning me in kisses.
Mr. Glascott: [higher-pitched] Uh...
Beverly: Alright. Enough with the musical scale. Just use your words.
Mr. Glascott: Even as the most casual observer of young Adam's dating life, you've been... How do I put this gently?
Virginia Kremp: A love-squeezing anaconda snuffing out his last breath of happiness?
Mr. Glascott: I was in the area of a bulldozer of carnage driven by Satan in a hard hat. It's playful and evocative.

Quote from Mr. Glascott

Beverly: Well, aren't you both clever. In fact, why don't you wrap up your [bleep] little sandwiches and get the [bleep] out?
Mr. Glascott: This can't be a surprise to you. You have been despicable to Jackie and Dana and, more recently, Brea Bee.
Beverly: Don't you seem to have quite the instant recall on Adam's former flames.
Mr. Glascott: As the William Penn guidance counselor, I find it essential to obsessively follow the romantic comings and goings of every student.
Virginia Kremp: So, that's actually far more disturbing than Beverly's dumb thing.

Quote from Barry

Joanne: Hey, babe. How was the friend hunt?
Barry: Really bad. Who knew finding another person to immediately trust, respect, and connect with was so hard?
Joanne: Maybe everyone?
Barry: Luckily, I found someone who'll always be there for me. Oh, no. I'm out of butterscotch drizzle corn! What can't go wrong today?
Joanne: Did you eat that whole tub?
Barry: I'm so alone.
Joanne: That was full when I left this morning.
Barry: Why has God forsaken me with only good looks and intelligence?
Joanne: That's like three gallons of sugar and salt.

Quote from Barry

Joanne: Stop! You have more friends than you know.
Barry: Despite our great rapport, my relationship with the annoyed woman at Foot Locker was purely transactional. Plus, it could never work. I have a natural inclination to yell at referees.
Joanne: No! Remember when you were secretly watching sports and weirdly holding hands with Bill Lewis?
Barry: I have a rich and varied life filled with bizarre adventures.
Joanne: And remember when Mrs. Kremp put you in the floral fridge and now you have coffee sometimes?
Barry: Again, my exploits are renowned for their offbeat and fantastical nature.
Joanne: And don't you constantly go to Mr. Glascott for advice so personal that he cries and begs you to stop?
Barry: Yeah, but he's the neighborhood's guidance counselor.
Joanne: He's not, mostly because that's not a thing. He's just your friend.
Barry: I have friends? I have friends. I... have... friends!
Joanne: Now you can relax and bring the JTP back into your life.
Barry: Or I have the perfect crew to throw in their dumb faces!

Quote from Mr. Glascott

Mr. Glascott: Flattered as I am, I don't know if I can commit to a friend group. I prefer to bask in the glow of one mon ami at a time.

Quote from Bill Lewis

Virginia Kremp: And I've held my tongue long enough, but I would never join a friend group that included Bill Lewis.
Bill Lewis: Oh, here we go. Let the crazy lady say her crazy words.
Virginia Kremp: The only thing crazy was the tile work you did in my powder room.
Bill Lewis: I tried to talk you out of that faux limestone, but someone puts way too much of a premium on slip-resistance.
Mr. Glascott: Is it possible to start a correspondence friends group where we all keep in touch by writing letters?
Bill Lewis: And I know it was you that complained to the Homeowners' Association about my garden gnomes.

Quote from Geoff

Barry: "GALS"? What the hell? Where are all the E's?
Andy: Matt was supposed to bring them.
Naked Rob: Yeah, but when Matt couldn't make it, Geoff was supposed to do it.
Geoff: I brought the seat pads so that we could sit on something soft and pillowy.
Naked Rob: No one asked you to do that.
Geoff: Oh, I'm sorry, now I'm the bad guy because I care about my friends' bottom comfort?

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