Geoff: Dude, it's a time capsule, not a time machine. Right?
Evelyn Silver: You're funny and have trouble making eye contact with girls. I like it. All except for the haircut and the posture, but I can fix that.
Geoff: Thanks, I think?

Geoff: Hey, Erica. Oh. You want to sign my yearbook? I saved you precious real estate right next to my face.
Erica: Fine.
Geoff: Yeah, you know, if you need some more time with it, you could just give it back to me. Okay, you're done. "Have a summer." Did you mean, like, "good summer" or Or "bitchin' summer" or Or "sexy summer"?
Erica: Just "summer".

Geoff: New Kids on the B., huh? You know, my Nana says that I look like handsome renegade Donnie Wahlberg.
Erica: Oh, your Nana is so sweet but wrong.
Evelyn Silver: If you're any Donnie, you're Donny Osmond. Clean and non-threatening. I dig that.
Geoff: Thanks?

Beverly: No, no, no, no, no! That blankie is the only thing I have to remember my favorite baby!
Erica: First of all, ouch. But I think this is a good thing. Your closet time is, how do I put it? Sad and creepy.

Geoff: D-D-D-Don't worry! I'll I'll plug it with my body! [Screaming] Erica, save me! Geoff! My tummy's drowning!

Principal Ball: Beverly Goldberg! My office now!
Beverly: May I ask what this is regarding?

Lainey: We just need to undo what happened.
Barry: Right. Easy.
Lainey: So, just lure Adam into a public space and dispense a swift beatdown for all to see.
Barry: Done. Quick question. Is there anything else I can do that doesn't require me going near him?
Lainey: Why?
Barry: I'm, like- How would you put it? Very afraid of him.
Lainey: Adam, your nerdy brother, who dives for cover when someone pops a balloon?
Barry: Correct.
Lainey: This is a lot.

Principal Ball: Both of you are suspended for the day. Called your parents. They're on their way to pick you up.
Beverly: Message received. Come on, Schmoo.
Principal Ball: Buh-buh-buh-bip! I called your husband. I'm suspending you from parenting for the day.
Murray: Nice try, but Murray won't care unless money's involved.
Principal Ball: Here's the bill.

Barry: Look at him sitting there, Pops, acting like a badass street punk.
Pops: Adam?
Barry: Correct.
Pops: With the cartoons and the gelatin candies?
Barry: He thinks he's bad? Well, I'll show him who's bad.
Adam: I wouldn't do that if I were you.
Barry: Why not?
Adam: 'Cause I'm enjoying my leisure time. If I stand up, you're gonna regret it.

Barry: Goodbye, nunchucks. I will need you no more. Find a master who's not a wussbag. Arigato, samurai sword. This is not a place of honor. It's a place of shame.
Pops: [to Adam] What did you do to the boy? He's trying to murder that garbage can.