Kitty: Where are you off to, honey?
Eric: Oh, I'm off to a little thing I like to call my new job. That's right. Despite both your best efforts to keep me and Donna from getting married, I can now afford to, because I got a new job at the dog-food factory.
Red: Dog food. Well, you finally made it, son!
Eric: Hey, I'll have you know I am the coupon liaison.
Red: Do you even know what you're getting yourself into? When I pass that factory on my way home from fishing, I hold a dead fish up to my face, so I don't have to smell it.
Kitty: Seriously. Honey, dog food? [Schotzie whines] [Kitty covers Schotzie's ears] That is the worst part of the cow.
Red: You won't last the day. [laughs]
Eric: I will last the day. And you know what? Donna and I are getting married. And I'm sorry, but just because of your attitude no one here will be getting the employee family discount on Pupper Supper. Thank you very much.

[Red walks into his kitchen and finds Fez waiting for him]
Fez: Oh, Mr. Red. I need some advice. I had an erotic dream about Kelso.
[Red turns around and walks straight out]

Kelso: Fez had a dream and- [whispers] And I was doing stuff to him in it. And I don't want to do it again! I'm scared to let him go to sleep!
Fez: See, Kelso was a nurse. And I had no shirt. And he had a sponge. A soft one!
Kitty: Okay, boys dreams are- are just compilations of what you experience during the day. What did you do yesterday?
Fez: Um, Kelso and I looked at nurses. Um, oh, and I ate 39 spicy egg rolls that were on the floor.
Kitty: Well, spicy foods. There you go. You know, one time, I ate stuffed peppers before I went to bed and I dreamt that I ended a war by giving the prime minister a belly dance.
Fez: So my dream didn't mean anything.
Kelso: Oh, thank God. I mean, I love you, Fez, just not in that way.
Fez: And my appreciation for your beauty is purely aesthetic.
Kelso: You know what, Fez? Maybe right now is not a great time for you to be complimenting my ass.

Red: Look at you. You got that great dog-food job now and plenty of dog-food money coming in, and... I mean, you two are happy, right?
Donna: Very happy.
Eric: Yes.
Red: Of course you are. And that's why I've changed my mind. This promising new career in dog food has convinced me that you two are mature enough to get married.
Eric: What? A-Are you serious?
Red: Absolutely. Hey, let's get you happy kids hitched as soon as possible. Like next week.
Donna: Next week? Wow, that's- That's really soon.
Eric: Yeah, I- Sooner than we thought. We were thinking, like, someday.
Donna: Yeah. Yeah, someday. That's good.
Red: Yeah. Well, what's the matter? I mean, uh... getting engaged is a silly, fun thing to do but now that we're talking about an actual wedding you're turning into a couple of dumbass kids who aren't ready? [chuckles] 'Cause, I mean, if you're not ready... Heck, I got myself all excited for nothing.

Hyde: I bet Jackie's been fooling around with Kelso this whole time. I feel like an idiot.
Kitty: Oh, my poor, little broody-brood. [laughs] You know, when I first met you you were such a cute, little guy. And now you're... you're a great, big guy with... with great, big hair and... and great, big problems my little broody-brood. [laughs] Oh, wait. Wait, wait, wait. [puts a cocktail umbrella in Hyde's hair] There. [laughs] You may leave me now.

Jackie: Oh, hey, Mrs. Forman, have you seen Steven?
Kitty: Oh, honey, I've had a couple sips of wine, and I don't remember. Oh, but you know what you need? You need more umbrellas in your hair. [laughs] Oh, bartender, we're gonna need more umbrellas.

Eric: Ah, the annual nurses' convention. You know, according to my bathroom reading, all nurses are actually horny for high school boys.
Hyde: Why do you think those hospital gowns have no backs? So the nurses can check out your ass.
Kelso: Look at this sexy stampede. It's like Wild Kingdom.
Fez: I will stalk their sexy herd like a lion. I cannot run as fast, but let's see a lion put on this much cologne.

Fez: Oh, hey, Roy.
Roy: Hi, guys. Oh, st-stay away from this batch of egg rolls. They were on the floor.
Eric: Oh, you dropped them?
Roy: No, I was lying down.

Nurse: Hi there. So, do you work here?
Hyde: Yeah, I'm stuck here all night.
Nurse: That's good. 'Cause I'll probably be doin' some things I'll regret later. If you're interested.
Hyde: Thanks for the offer, but, uh, I have a girlfriend.
Nurse: What a coincidence. I have a room.
Roy: You know, I don't have a girlfriend. But I have, uh, written several love letters to Barbara Walters, so, uh... [the nurse walks away]
Kelso: Oh, Roy, you're going after the wrong ones, man. You gotta think like a lion and pick off the weakest member of the herd. Well, like that one, with the braces and the desperate eyes.
Fez: Oh, she's not making it past sundown. [growls]

Jackie: How was your day?
Hyde: Oh, it was brutal. How can nurses wolf down mini pizzas right after watching a film strip on butt rashes?
Jackie: Yeah. No, I know. Michael and I were hanging at The Hub and he told me it's been tough.
Hyde: What? No, no, no. You don't need to be hanging out with Kelso alone.
Jackie: Why not?
Hyde: Because I don't trust him.
Jackie: Yeah, but don't you trust me?
Hyde: No! Haven't you been paying attention? I don't trust anything. I don't trust the government. I don't trust the newspapers. I'm not even sure what time we think it is right now is really what time it is. But most of all, I don't trust you and Kelso alone together.
Jackie: [sighs] All right. You know what? I guess I deserve that. So, I promise I won't be alone with Michael anymore. However, I do think you're making a big deal out of nothing.
Hyde: That's what you said after you yelled "get off my boyfriend" when you saw Kelso kissing Annette.
Jackie: Okay, what do I have to do to get you to stop bringing that up? [Hyde smiles] I'm not doing that.
Hyde: Then I'm gonna keep bringing it up.