Eric: I can't believe Donna's going out with this guy from work. You know, I made a point of going down there and spreading a rumor that she had crabs.

Hyde: Don't talk to me, Forman. This whole thing with Jackie is all your fault.
Eric: How?
Hyde: Because I wouldn't have even been in the basement last night when Jackie came over, if we had gone to go play pinball like I wanted. But you wouldn't go. So now I gotta figure out my entire life because you claimed the change guy touched you weird.
Eric: He put the quarters right into my pocket.

Donna: You had to see Eric's face when I told him about my date, he was all nervous and surprised. It reminded me of his sex face.
Jackie: Donna, I don't wanna hear about Eric's sex face. I'm upset enough.
Donna: You wanna know what the best part is? I don't even have a date. I made the whole thing up just to mess with Eric's head.

Jackie: I wish I had manipulated Steven instead of opening up my heart. Now I'm the vulnerable one waiting for his answer.
Donna: Yeah, I was a little surprised. I mean, the bitchy stuff is your bread and butter.
Jackie: You know, I had fake pregnancy right up my sleeve and I didn't even use it.

Hyde: Whoa. Holy crap. That's the most beer I've ever seen.
Charlie: Let me just hit the lights. [lights come on]
Hyde: Let me rephrase that. That's the most beer I've ever seen.

Fez: It's the mother lode.
Eric: It's like now I know how the immigrants felt when they finally saw the majestic skyline of New York City.
Charlie: Actually, Eric, most of the immigrants arrived in the 19th century before the skyline was ever built. I mean, beer!
Kelso: I... I... I don't know where to start.
Charlie: You know, the kegs are cold. Why don't we start with the kegs?
Fez: Hey, we'll handle this, new guy. We'll start with the kegs.

Red: Girls, please tell me that Charlie is here.
Donna: Wait, isn't he at your house with the guys?
Red: No. Oh, sweet Lord, they got him.

Hyde: Okay, I finally made up my mind about Jackie. I'm gonna marry her. I'm gonna be Mrs. Jackie Hyde.
Eric: I think you need one more beer.
Hyde: Could be.
Kelso: Virgin. Man, how do you not have sex with all those girls that are always throwing themselves at you?
Fez: That doesn't happen to everyone, jackass.
Hyde: How dare she give me an ultimatum? This is my life she's messing with. She can go to hell. I will see her in hell!
Eric: Maybe one more.
Hyde: One more couldn't hurt.

Fez: Eric, I wonder what Donna's doing on her date.
Eric: Oh, you know what, man? I don't care. She just wants me to come running after her, and I'm not gonna do that.
Kelso: You know what? That is totally the right move, man. Plus, it's, like, after 9:00, so if you go over there now, you'll probably walk in on her and that guy sliding all over each other.
Fez: And if I know Donna, she's moaning like a ghost.
Eric: Okay, Donna does not moan like a ghost.
Fez: I could make her moan like a ghost.

Hyde: [puts arm on Kelso] You know what, guys? I'm a little confused, but I do know that I love you guys. I really, really do. [kisses Kelso's cheek] Hey, where'd Kelso go?