Hyde: What are you doing back there, Fez?
Fez: I- I was- I was just showing Caroline the back of my new car and my tongue.
Kelso: Fez, this isn't your car.
Jackie: Yeah. Foreigners can't drive here unless it's a cab.

Fez: I don't ever have to worry about forgetting Caroline's birthday. She wrote it on my arm with permanent marker. Isn't she sweet?
Hyde: More like psycho.
Fez: What are you doing calling my girlfriend psycho?
Hyde: Oh, I'm sorry, Fez, did I say psycho? I meant nut bag, head case, wackadoo. She chokes herself, man.
Fez: Well, Hyde, maybe- Maybe you should- Maybe you should choke yourself! Good day.
Hyde: Fez.
Fez: I said good day!

Hyde: Wait a second. You're too mature to go cruising with me, but you go to the mall with Jackie?
Kelso: Yeah. It's this new thing we're trying, man. We're friends. See, I did some reflecting, and I realized that Jackie is the only girl I want to be with.
Eric: Today?
Kelso: No, every day. See, we were meant to be together. She just doesn't know it yet. Yeah, but I have a plan.
Donna: Oh, no.
Kelso: Oh, yeah. See, she wants to be just friends, right? Okay, so I'll be her friend. But what she doesn't realize is that I'm also a boy. Yeah, and sooner or later, friend is gonna lead down the path to boy. And then I'll be her friend-boy.

Jackie: You know, Michael, I'm really enjoying our time together.
Kelso: Really? Me too.
Jackie: Yeah, you know, the makeup, shopping, braiding each other's hair... You are like the girlfriend I never had.
Kelso: Oh. Well, thanks, Jackie. W-Wait. Girlfriend?
Jackie: [giggles] Yeah. I mean, Donna's nice and everything but she kinda dresses like a trucker.

Kelso: Man, what fun is it being a girlfriend if you don't even have your own boobs to play with?

Eric & Red: Happy birthday!
Kitty: Oh, you remembered?
Red: Well, of course we remembered, honey. We just figured that we'd wait till there was only 15 minutes left in the day and you were good and mad, and then we'd sneak up here and surprise the hell out of you.
Kitty: Wow, what a good plan. 'Cause I was awfully mad.
Red: Yeah. We really had you going.
Eric: Here, Mom. Open this one first. It's from me.
Kitty: Well, thank you, honey. [unwraps a pamphlet] Oh, a map of Wisconsin. Oh, well, thank you.
Eric: And, Mom, I got you these balloons too.
Kitty: [chuckles] "Knock out the knock-knocks at Schiffy's Gas-N-Go." Huh.

Caroline: Isn't he cute? Fezzie, I told you. You don't have to try and impress me anymore. I'm your girlfriend now.
Fez: Oh, I'm sorry, Caroline. From now on, I will be totally honest.
Caroline: Good. Now, come on, walk me home.
Fez: Ah, yes. And on the way, I can tell you about the time I killed a shark with a coconut.

Hyde: All right, Kelso, let's go out cruising for hot chicks with self-esteem problems.
Kelso: Yeah. No, thanks, man. I don't do that stuff anymore.
Hyde: Shut up and come on.
Kelso: No, man, I mean it. I've matured.
Jackie: Hey, Donna, wanna go to the mall? Rerun from What's Happening!! is opening up the new Dairy Queen.
Donna: Actually, Jackie, as fun as that sounds, um, no.
Kelso: What? "Hey, hey, hey." I'm in.
Jackie: Okay. Well, let me get my beret and some Certs with Retsyn.

Hyde: Hey, Mrs. Forman. Happy birthday.
Kitty: Oh. I can't believe you remembered. You are the first person to say anything all day. And how did you know I needed more flashbulbs? Thank you. [kisses Hyde on the cheek] So, do you wanna stay for dinner?
Hyde: Oh, no, thanks. I'm just gonna grab a sandwich.
Kitty: A sandwich! Steven, a sandwich is a sandwich, but a Manwich is a meal.
Hyde: Oh, well, thanks, Mrs. Forman.

Kelso: See, the boatneck adds dimension to your shoulders. And the plum color, that really accents your jewel-toned eyes.
Jackie: Oh, my God. Michael, you just described my perfect outfit. You are so good at this.
Kelso: Yeah, I have a knack for ensembles.