Dina: Hang on. Elias went on a date with two women?
Cheyenne: It's probably just his wife's sister or something.
Dina: Mm, yeah. I don't think so.
Cheyenne: Oh, my God! Elias is in a throuple.
Dina: Throuple. Is that like when three hideous people get together?
Cheyenne: Just three people.
Dina: Oh.
Cheyenne: But yeah, they usually are.

Glenn: [on the phone] While I have you on the phone, what'd you think of the employee who signed you up? His name's Mateo. And I think he's a real dummy! A class A stinker!
Mateo: [walks up] What are you saying about me?
Glenn: Oh.
Jonah: [on the line with affected voice] Mr. Sturgis, I need to get back to work.
Glenn: Uh, okay, then. Well... h-have a heavenly day. [hangs up]
Mateo: Oh. Who were you talking to?
Glenn: Martin Nestle.
Mateo: Oh.
Garrett: Lost the trace.

Cheyenne: Did you know Marcus has a podcast called Celebrities I Would Bone, and in every episode he just lists celebrities he would bone.
Dina: Man, there is an audience out there for anything.

Amy: [rapping on video] Yo, yo, yo. It's Cloud 9 Amy doin' my trick. Zonin' this aisle to make it look sick! You want batteries? I got loads of D's. And some frozen peas full of vitamin C! Self-check yourself before you wreck yourself. Self-check yourself before you wreck yourself.
Amy: Self-check yourself before you wreck yourself. Get it? So?
Dina: Wow, Amy.
Cheyenne: So fun.
Amy: It's a work in progress, and... and I know it's corny. That's what makes it funny. Right?
Dina: Oh, yeah. Yeah, definitely.
Cheyenne: So funny.

Jonah: I went to theater camp for two summers. That was my Audrey II voice.
Mateo: Calm down. It was fine.

Glenn: Mateo, I want to apologize, both for the things that I said about you, and for thinking that you would ever make up a customer.
Mateo: Well, it's just hard. I was accused of a crime by my boss and role model.
Jonah: Take the win.
Glenn: I wanna make it up to you. How about lunch? We'll go up to the Beef Barn and get a... a table right near the tractor?
Mateo: Uh, you know, I am actually starting to get over it.
Garrett: Mateo, he's trying to apologize to you.
Jonah: A nice, long lunch, just the two of you? Oh, so lucky!
Garrett: Glenn, you know, maybe lunch isn't enough. You were really rude to him.
Jonah: Oh, yeah, you were. Maybe stop by a few museums or something on the way.
Glenn: I suppose we could.
Mateo: Lunch sounds great. Lunch.
Glenn: Terrific. I can't wait!
Garrett: Hmm. I'm feeling less jealous.

Dina: Two women want that inside them.
Cheyenne: What would it take to get you to sleep with Elias?
Dina: $435 grand. I have a figure for everyone here. Yours is only 75 bucks, by the way.
Cheyenne: Oh, thank you. What about Glenn?
Dina: There's not enough money in the world.

Amy: [on video] [beat-boxes] This is so stupid. All of these videos are stupid. Not everything needs to be documented. Look at where I am! Look at what I ate for lunch today. Nobody cares! We're all becoming these narcissistic attention whores. How about we actually...
Garrett: Okay, at some point she's gotta see the rats.
Amy: [on video] Well, you know what? Watch, don't watch, I don't care. But if you like what you saw, you can follow me on Snapchat, Instagram, and Twitter on @Cloud9AmyD.
Jonah: I don't think she saw the rats.
Garrett: I don't think so.

Glenn: I am really looking forward to this, Mateo. I don't get to take my employees to lunch very often.
Mateo: Well, only the lucky ones, I guess.
Glenn: Yeah, I got to take Jonah to lunch once. I really got to know him. You know, his interests, his background, his voice.
Mateo: Oh?
Glenn: Hey, and since we're going to Clayton, you know what's on the way? Martin Nestle's office. Maybe we should drop by. Unless there's some reason you don't wanna go.
Mateo: Nope. I would... love to visit Martin.
Glenn: Great.
Mateo: Great.
Glenn: Great.
Mateo: Great.
Glenn: Great.

Amy: Oh, hey, Jonah, will you help me read something real quick? Bam! 15,000 views! Ha-ha!
Jonah: Yep.
Amy: And I only posted it half an hour ago, which means there must be a real appetite for smart social commentary.
Jonah: I guess I'm cleaning the rat traps.
Amy: Yeah. I guess you are.
Jonah: Oh, hey, speaking of the rat traps, did you get a chance to watch the video before you posted it?
Amy: No. Why?
[cut to:]
Jeff: I know I never explicitly said not to post videos of rat infestations in the kitchen, but I thought I didn't need to.