‘My Mirror Image’
Season 6, Episode 1 - Aired November 30, 2006
J.D., Dr. Cox and the Janitor see a bit of themselves in hospital patients: J.D. struggles to accept the life-changing news that Kim is pregnant, Dr. Cox's anger is causing problems at home, and the Janitor is caught up on finding new ways to torture J.D. Meanwhile, Elliot is upset that she's seemingly the only person in the hospital who isn't expecting a child.
Quote from Turk
J.D.: Why didn't you answer your phone when I called you?
Turk: I was dancing.
J.D.: Oh. Wait, let me hear it.
['N Sync's "Bye Bye Bye" plays]
Quote from J.D.
Kim: [on the phone] Well, look, I'm in surgery all morning, but we can meet for lunch, talk this through then, okay? Hello? J.D., this is a really bad connection...
J.D.: Ted, please! [Ted closes his Pop Rocks-filled mouth] Ted! [Ted clamps his nostrils shut]
Quote from Dr. Cox
J.D.: My life is over.
Dr. Cox: Oh, come on, you gotta focus on the positives. For instance, the medical miracle that is one woman actually impregnating another woman. Shadaisy! [J.D. walks away]
Turk: Coincidentally, I have a cousin named Shadaisy!
Dr. Cox: What?
Quote from Dr. Cox
Jordan: Perry? What the hell? I just got a call from Jack's school. Apparently they served spaghetti for lunch, so he had some sort of Vietnam flashback. We're having a second baby. You need to deal with your anger issues.
Dr. Cox: I don't have any anger issues.
Intern #2: Dr. Cox, I'm sorry, but my asthma is really... starting... to... [pants]
Dr. Cox: [shouts] Get outta here!
Jordan: Seriously?
Quote from Carla
Carla: Mr. Slydell here is suffering from peptic ulcer disease and hypertension, two conditions you'll often see in very angry people.
Dr. Cox: Well, now, now, you don't know that this gentleman is angry.
Mr. Slydell: Damn it! Why won't this TV go on? [throws remote]
Carla: That was the bed remote.
Quote from Ted
Keith: Ted, I got the cola. Did you get the Pop Rocks?
Ted: No, the vending machine was out, so I went to the generic store and got some "Fizzy Pebbles."
Keith: Sure we should do this?
Ted: I'm sick of legends and hearsay, Keith! I have to know!
Quote from Janitor
Janitor: Okay, what if I get a sex-change operation, and I trick him into marrying me?
Old Man: But if it doesn't work, you'll just be an older, fairly ugly, janitor woman.
Janitor: That's true.
Old Man: You know, you and I are quite a bit alike. I spent most of my life trying to become a lawyer. But I could never get my Juris Doctorate.
Janitor: How does that make us alike?
Old Man: Oh, I spent years trying to get that damn J.D.
Quote from Dr. Cox
J.D.: [v.o.] As I thought about how Mrs. Zeebee and I had gotten such a raw deal, I realized how easy it was for doctors to see themselves in their patients. Whether it's in the choices they made in their life.
Mr. Slydell: My anger not only cost me my health, it also cost me my job, my marriage. It cost me damn near everything.
Dr. Cox: You're killing me.
Quote from Janitor
J.D.: [v.o.] Or the choices they didn't make.
Old Man: I was so obsessed with getting my J.D. that I never did the things I really wanted to do, start a family, see the world.
Janitor: Punch a whale?
Old Man: No, I punched a whale, right in the face. Down he went, like Liston.
Quote from Dr. Cox
Carla: Um, why doesn't Elliot have a freshly-ripped new one right now?
Dr. Cox: I'm not freshly ripping anybody anything anymore. I am done with anger.
Jordan: Oh, is that gonna be like the time you quit drinking? Cause that was the longest twenty minutes of my life!
Dr. Cox: Your sarcasm is wasted on me, you giant pregnant beast. This is an anger-free zone. There's no anger here. [yells as he stubs his toe on the counter] Counter! [laughs]