‘The One with the Hypnosis Tape’
Season 3, Episode 18 - Aired March 13, 1997
Rachel buys Chandler a hypnosis tape to get him to stop smoking. Meanwhile, Monica is asked out by a customer at the diner, and Phoebe freaks out when her 18-year-old brother announces he's marrying an older woman.
Quote from Chandler
Chandler: You know, I would have bet good money that he'd be the first one of us to get married.
Phoebe: Isn't it fantastic?
Monica: Yeah, but don't you think he's a little young to get married?
Phoebe: Well, he's 18.
Ross: Exactly. It will be illegal for him to drink at his own bachelor party.
Joey: Yeah, or to get a hooker.
Chandler: Always illegal, Joe.
Quote from Chandler
Frank: I was in her Home Ec class.
Alice: And he was my best student.
Frank: Yeah, she was my best teacher.
[Frank and Alice passionately kiss]
Chandler: If that doesn't keep kids in school, what will?
Quote from Phoebe
Joey: Well, have you told him how you feel?
Phoebe: Yes. Not out loud.
Quote from Rachel
Rachel: I think you should definitely go out with this guy.
Monica: Nah. He just doesn't do anything for me.
Rachel: Monica, last Saturday night, what happened on "Walker, Texas Ranger"?
Monica: Well, um, Walker was looking for this big busload of kids. He was- All right, I get your point.
Quote from Ross
Joey: Look, the point is, there's a lot of women out there you haven't even had sex with yet.
Ross: Yeah, he's right. He's right. This is your time, you know? You're young, you're weird ... chicks dig that.
Quote from Joey
Frank: Okay, but isn't sex better when it's with one person that you really, really care about?
Joey: Yeah, in a poem, maybe.
Quote from Joey
Joey: So, we're walking down the street, and I turn to you and I say: "Hey, let's go hang out at Totally Nude Nudes." Remember? And then, heh, you turn to me and say, "Let's just hang out at your place." Well, that was a nice move, dumb-ass.