Phoebe: Joey, how could you just let them leave?
Joey: Hey, hey, hey. I'm not gonna mess with Jack. He's a great man. He fought for our country.
Monica: No, he didn't. He pretended to be a Quaker to get out of Korea.

Estelle: Joey, it's Estelle.
Joey: Hey.
Estelle: So how'd your audition go today?
Joey: What audition?
Estelle: The one I told you about last week.
Joey: What? You never said anything about an audition.
Estelle: Let me start over. I just got a call about an audition. I think you can still make it. It's down at the Astor Theater, and you need to have a monologue prepared.
Joey: A monologue? I don't have a- [Joey picks up the children's book] Got it.

Monica: Let's figure out a fair way to decide who's staying.
Joey: Oh, I got it. Okay, everyone pick a number from one to 10, all right? Whoever gets the highest number gets to go first.
Monica: Okay, 10.
Joey: Okay, Monica picks 10. I call nine. Anyone else?

Phoebe: No, let's just draw straws.
Joey: Okay. Or we could flip a coin and multiply the answer-
Chandler: I'm begging you to stop.
Joey: Right.

Rachel: Look, you made it into a bunny. How did you do that?
Ross: Well, I just made these two things cheeks. And then I split this to make ears.
Rachel: Well, I am very impressed.
Ross: Some can sing, some can dance. I, apparently, can turn phallic cakes into woodland creatures.

Monica: Now, another way to organize your stuffed animals is by size.
Chandler: I'm sorry, is this a game for Emma or for Monica?
Monica: Game?

Chandler: Emma, how old are you? How old are you today?
Rachel: Emma, that's right. You're that many.
Ross: Oh, my God, our daughter's a genius. Rach, this means-
Rachel: No! No science camp.
Ross: Damn it!

Rachel: Wait, you can't go away this weekend. It's Emma's birthday.
Ross: Yeah.
Rachel: We're having a party.
Monica: Well, can't you have the party when we get back?
Rachel: No. It won't be her real birthday.
Chandler: Gee, if only she were 1 and had no idea what the hell a birthday was.

Chandler: Honey, I got us that room at the Woodford Inn this weekend.
Monica: That place in Vermont? You can take a hint.

Ross: Come on, you guys, this is really important to us. Monica: I'm sorry, but Chandler and I could really use a weekend away you know, to reconnect, emotionally.
Chandler: There's this thing I really want us to do. I read about it in Maxim.
Rachel: Well, can't you just go to Vermont the next day?
Ross: Yeah, we want everyone to be there. As much as I hate to delay your doing weird sex stuff to my little sister.