‘The One with All the Poker’
Season 1, Episode 18 - Aired March 2, 1995
Tired of being a waitress, Rachel applies for a job at Saks Fifth Avenue. After the boys introduce the girls to poker, they seek help from Monica's Aunt so they can beat the guys.
Quote from Joey
Monica: All right, here we go. We've got salmon roulettes and assorted crudites.
Joey: Whoa, whoa, whoa, Monica. What are you doing? This is a poker game. You can't serve food with more than one syllable. It's got to be like chips or dip or pretz-
Quote from Monica
Rachel: Can you believe what a jerk Ross was being?
Monica: Yeah, I know. He can get really competitive.
Phoebe: [laughs]
Monica: What?
Phoebe: "Hello, kettle? This is Monica. You're black!"
Monica: Please! I'm not as bad as Ross. I beg to differ.
Rachel: Oh, I beg to differ. The Pictionary incident?
Monica: That was not an incident. I was gesturing and the plate slipped out of my hand.
Quote from Chandler
Rachel: Guys, guess what?
Chandler: Ah, what could it be? The fifth dentist caved, and now they're all recommending Trident?
Quote from Rachel
Ross: All right. Your money's mine, Green.
Rachel: Your fly's open, Geller.
Quote from Phoebe
Rachel: Oh! I got an interview!
Monica: You're kidding! Where?
Rachel: Saks Fifth Avenue.
Monica: Oh, Rachel!
Phoebe: It's like the mother ship is calling you home.
Quote from Joey
Ross: Uh, Rach, did you proofread these?
Rachel: Yeah. Why?
Ross: Nothing. I'm sure they'll be impressed with your excellent "compuper" skills.
Rachel: Oh, my God! Do you think it's on all of them?
Joey: Oh, no, I'm sure the Xerox machine caught a few of them.
Quote from Chandler
Ross: That's fine with me. Could use some money.
Rachel: So, basically, you get your ya-yas by taking money from your friends.
Ross: Yeah.
Chandler: Yes, and I get my ya-yas from IKEA. You have to put them together yourself, but they cost a little less.
Quote from Rachel
Rachel: I can't be a waitress anymore. I mean it. I'm sick of the lousy tips. I'm sick of being called "Excuse Me."
Quote from Phoebe
Rachel: Hi, ladies. Can I get you anything? Did you bring the mail?
Monica: Lots of responses.
Rachel: Really? Sure, we have scones left! Okay, read them to me.
Phoebe: "Dear Miss Greene: Thank you for your inquiry.However-". Oh.
Rachel: We have apple cinnamon-
Monica: Okay, "Dear Ms. Greene." Yeah, yeah! No.
Phoebe: Wow.
Rachel: What?
Phoebe: Your Visa bill is huge!
Quote from Phoebe
Joey: You know what, you guys? It's their first time. Why don't we just forget about the money?
Monica: Hell, no. We'll pay!
Phoebe: Monica, I had another answer all ready.