Rachel: Monica, you should totally put your name down for this place.
Monica: What? Are you crazy? I'm not getting married. I'm not even engaged.
Phoebe: Yeah, but there's a two-year wait. And what if you get engaged in two years? Then you've gotta wait another two years for this place? That's four years. Chandler's not gonna wait that long. He's gonna find somebody else, you know? Someone who did put their name on the list.

Joey: So, did you watch the tape of my show?
Dry Cleaner: I did.
Joey: All right. Let's get me back up there.
Dry Cleaner: No. You don't go up on the wall.
Joey: What? But you saw the show.
Dry Cleaner: Yes. It was very offensive to my people.
Joey: Dry cleaners?

Dry Cleaner: Russians. It showed them as terrorists and villains.
Joey: Okay, okay. Look, you got Harrison Ford up there.
Dry Cleaner: That's right. Mr. Ford is a very good customer. He brings us a lot of clothes. You bring us nothing.
Joey: Okay, that may be true. But in Air Force One, okay, the Russians were terrorists and evil. And plus, he kills a bunch of them. That's offensive to Russians.
Dry Cleaner: I've never seen it.
Joey: Oh, you should. It's great.

Rachel: Well, why don't you go in that room and do your homework?
Elizabeth: Well, I wouldn't do it in there. That's my dad's bedroom.
Rachel: That's your dad's bedroom. That's your dad's bedroom!
Paul: Why are you yelling?
Rachel: Oh, that Diet Coke, I think, went straight to my head.

Joey: Well, make sure you tell him that Joey Tribbiani dropped off these clothes. I'm an actor. I'm trying to get my picture up there on the wall.
Dry Cleaner's Wife: You know, there are two people who could get your picture up there.
Joey: Oh, really? Well, maybe you and I go out for drinks. You're the other one, right?

Monica: Phoebe?
Phoebe: Yeah?
Monica: Have you seen Chandler?
Phoebe: No, why?
Monica: The woman from the museum called and said that there was a cancellation and that we could move up our wedding. And Chandler heard.
[Phoebe gasps]
Monica: I know. How bad is this?
Phoebe: Well, with a regular guy it's bad. With Chandler, oh, dear God!
Monica: I know. I know. And he totally freaked out and I can't find him anywhere.
Phoebe: What are you gonna do?
Monica: Well, I'm never going to listen to you again, that's for sure. "What harm can it do to put your name down?"
Phoebe: Rachel said that.
Monica: Well, Rachel's not here.

Ross: Please, Paul. Just let me explain.
Paul: No. Let me explain. Fired!
Ross: Okay, fine. Fine. Have me fired. But, I want you to know that you and I are not all that different. I mean l, too, am a "neat guy."
Paul: What?
Ross: And l, too am "just a love machine." [humming, grunts]
Paul: Ross, let me show you where the guest room is.

Monica: I'm so sorry. Please stop freaking out.
Chandler: I'm not freaking out. Why would I be freaking out? A woman named Hildy called and said we were getting married. But that happens every day. Ah-ah-ah!

Joey: Hey, Gunther.
Gunther: Hey. Take these cappuccinos to table 11. And that guy over there wants some biscotti.
Joey: Oh, well, I just actually came in for a cup of coffee to go.
Gunther: Do you still work here?
Joey: No. I quit a long time ago. Did I forget to tell you that? I'm sorry.
Gunther: Oh, that's cool. I was gonna fire you anyway.
Joey: Great.

Joey: So I'm back.
Dry Cleaner: Who are you?
Joey: Joey Tribbiani. From the wall? Okay, maybe this will jog your memory. Okay, anyway. I'm ready to go back up on the wall. I'm the star of a new TV show.
Dry Cleaner: Show me in the TV book.
Joey: Well, it's not on TV yet.
Dry Cleaner: Well, then it's not on the wall yet.