‘The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad’ Quotes Page 1 of 5
621. The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad
Aired April 27, 2000
Ross is nervous to meet Elizabeth's father, Paul, for the first time. After Ross ropes his friends in to try make him look good, Paul takes a shine to Rachel. Meanwhile, Joey insults the person who controls his robot co-star on MAC and C.H.E.E.S.E., and Phoebe starts writing a book about Chandler and Monica.
Quote from Chandler
Ross: I just found out Elizabeth's dad wants to meet me.
Chandler: Wait a minute. Hold the phone. You're not Elizabeth's dad?
Quote from Monica
Ross: Come on, guys. I really want this guy to like me. It would really help me out if you guys could be here to make me look good.
Monica: Of course we'll help.
Ross: Thanks.
Monica: Yeah. We know how tough those parent-teacher conferences can be.
Quote from Ross
Elizabeth: This is my father, Paul Stevens. Dad, this is Ross Geller.
Ross: It's great to meet you, Paul.
Paul: I usually prefer that Liz's boyfriends address me as Mr. Stevens.
Ross: Of course. Mr. Stevens.
Paul: So, Ross what's your problem?
Ross: Excuse me?
Paul: Why can't you get a girlfriend your own age?
Ross: It's funny. ... Um, it's not funny.
Quote from Ross
Paul: I don't like you going out with my daughter, Ross.
Ross: Okay, I can see that. I think if you give me one chance, I can change your mind.
Paul: Okay.
Ross: What?
Paul: Okay. I'll give you one chance to change my mind. You've got one minute.
Elizabeth: Daddy.
Paul: Fine. Two minutes. Go.
[Ross stammers]
Paul: A minute and 50 seconds.
Ross: Okay. Um, I want you to know, I have never done anything like this before. I mean - I mean I've been in relationships in general. But I've never done it with a student. I mean, not.
Not "it." I mean, we haven't done "it." I mean- I mean we've done stuff. Okay. Okay. A joke. A joke. Lighten the mood. Two guys go into a bar. One of them is Irish.
Paul: I'm Irish.
Ross: And the lrish guy wins the joke.
Quote from Chandler
Monica: Is there a Mrs. Stevens?
Chandler: There's a Mr. Bing!
Quote from Rachel
Rachel: So it seemed that my prom date had stood me up, so Ross selflessly offered to take me.
Elizabeth: What a nice story.
Paul: So Ross was in college and decided to jump at the chance to take a young girl to her high school prom.
Rachel: Wow, I definitely did not see that one backfiring. I'm going to go to the bathroom.
Ross: Yeah, take your time.
Quote from Rachel
Paul: Don't worry about it. I just didn't realize you were married.
Rachel: Oh, we were, but that was just a- I mean, that was just a big drunken mistake.
Ross: You're back.
Paul: You two were married?
Rachel: Oh, whoops. I'm sorry. You were talking about Emily.
Quote from Phoebe
Monica: It is so strange seeing Ross here, this time of day because usually, well, he's at the children's hospital.
Phoebe: Yeah. But not looking for dates.
Quote from Joey
Joey: So where's C.H.E.E.S.E.?
Wayne: C.H.E.E.S.E. is right here.
C.H.E.E.S.E.: Nice to meet you, Mac. [Joey laughs]
Joey: This is like the temporary robot, right?
Wayne: No. Why?
Joey: Well, I just thought it was gonna be, like, a really cool robot. Like the Terminator, or when I first saw you.
Wayne: I spent two years developing this machine. It's absolutely state of the art.
Joey: I'm sorry. It just doesn't really look like it can do anything.
Wayne: It can do this.
Quote from Phoebe
Ross: What are you guys doing later?
Phoebe: Oh, Rachel and I have appointments to get our hair cut.
Rachel: We do?
Phoebe: I want to see what he wants first.