‘The One in Barbados (Part 1)’
Season 9, Episode 23 - Aired May 15, 2003
Ross and his friends attend a paleontology conference in Barbados where he's scheduled to give the key note address. Monica intervenes when Chandler gives David advice on his relationship with Phoebe. Charlie helps Ross reconstruct his speech when his computer is wiped.
Quote from Ross
Ross: You're never gonna guess who I just saw downstairs.
Joey: Ooh, uh, uh, Britney Spears.
Ross: Yeah. She never misses these conferences.
Quote from Joey
Ross: No, I just saw Dr. Kenneth Schwartz.
Charlie: Oh, my God.
Ross: I know.
Charlie: Did you talk to him?
Ross: Oh, yeah. What am I gonna say to Kenneth Schwartz?
Joey: You could say, "Hey, Kenny, how come you're not Britney Spears?"
Quote from Joey
Charlie: But maybe we could have dinner later? Out on the balcony? Lt'll be romantic.
Joey: Will you wear a thong?
Charlie: I will if you will.
Joey: You got yourself a very weird deal.
Ross: I'm good. I have dinner plans.
Quote from Joey
Joey: I got tons of stuff I could do. I'm gonna hit the beach, go swimming.
Ross: Joe, have you looked outside?
Joey: No. Why? Oh, man.
Charlie: There's an indoor pool. You could swim there.
Ross: Yeah.
Joey: I wasn't gonna swim. I was gonna dig a hole.
Quote from Monica
Monica: That Mike thing was interesting. I don't know what's gonna happen with Phoebe and David.
Chandler: I do. Want a hint, huh? I do. I do.
Monica: Okay, I'm sensing this is some kind of wordplay because you are pink with barely controlled glee.
Quote from Monica
Chandler: David's gonna propose to Phoebe.
Monica: What? Why?
Chandler: Because we were talking about ways he could beat Mike and I told him Phoebe wanted to get married.
Monica: Chandler, we have talked about this. You are not supposed to give people advice. Now, couldn't you have made some sort of inappropriate joke?
Chandler: I did. A penis one.
Quote from Rachel
Rachel: All right, I don't want to alarm anybody but Monica's hair is twice as big as it was when we landed.
Quote from Monica
Monica: Oh, honey? Can you make sure we get a king-size bed?
Phoebe: Oh, David, get one for us too. Oh, and see if they have a heart-shaped one. And with mirrors on the ceiling.
Monica: And make sure our room isn't next to theirs.
Quote from Rachel
Rachel: Oh, you guys are so lucky you're here with people. You know, it's just such a romantic place. I just wish I could share it with a guy.
Phoebe: Not Joey.
Rachel: Not Joey. No. I was just lusting after Chandler.
Monica: Yeah, right.
Quote from Chandler
Chandler: Monica, can I talk to you for a second?
Monica: Okay.
Chandler: David's gonna propose to Phoebe tonight.
Monica: See what happens when you give people advice? Well, I hope you told him not to.
Chandler: That would be advice.