Phoebe: [playing guitar and singing] Went to the store, Sat on Santa's lap, Asked him to bring my friends, All kinds of crap, Said all you need is, To write them a song, Now you haven't heard it yet, So don't try to sing along, No, don't sing along, Monica, Monica Have a happy Hannukah, Saw Santa Claus, He said hello to Ross, And please tell Joey, Christmas will be snowy, And Rachel and Chandler, [indistinct] Happy holidays, everybody!

Ross: I'm the Holiday Armadillo! I'm a friend of Santa's and he sent me here to wish you a merry Christmas.
Monica: What happened to Santa, Holiday Armadillo?
Ross: Santa was unavailable so close to Christmas.
Monica: Well, come in, have a seat. You must be exhausted, coming all the way from Texas.
Ben: Texas?
Ross: That's right, Ben. I'm Santa's representative for all the Southern states. And Mexico!

Phoebe: [playing guitar and singing] I found you in my bed, How'd you wind up there? You are a mystery, Little black curly hair, Little black curly hair, Little black, little black, little black, Little black curly hair.

Phoebe: [playing guitar and singing] Went to the store, Sat on Santa's lap, Asked him to bring my friends, All kinds of crap, Said all you need is, To write them a song, Now you haven't heard it yet, So don't try to sing along, No, don't sing along, Monica, Monica Have a happy Hannukah, Saw Santa Claus, He said hello to Ross, And please tell Joey, Christmas will be snowy, And Rachel and Chandler, [indistinct] Happy holidays, everybody!

Janice: I'm gonna blow this one up and write "Reunited" in glitter.
Chandler: All right, Janice, that's it! Janice. Janice. Hey, Janice, when I invited you, I didn't necessarily think it meant-
Janice: Oh, no! Oh, no! [crying]
Chandler: I'm sorry you misunderstood.
Janice: Oh, my God. You listen to me, Chandler. You listen to me. One of these times, it's just gonna be your last chance with me!

Phoebe: I wanna start with a song that means a lot to me this time of year. [singing] I made a man with eyes of coal, And a smile so bewitching, How was I supposed to know, That my mom was dead in the kitchen?

David: [mumbling] I was just saying-
Phoebe: Speak up.
David: Sorry, l was just saying to my friend that I thought you were the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen in my life. And then he said that he thought-
Max: Daryl Hannah
David: -was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen in his life. And then I said I liked her in Splash a lot, but not so much in Wall Street. I thought she had a-
Max: hard quality-
David: And while Daryl Hannah is beautiful in a conventional way, you are luminous with a kind of a delicate grace. Then that's when you started yelling.