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‘The One with the Girl from Poughkeepsie’ Quotes

Friends: The One with the Girl from Poughkeepsie

410. The One with the Girl from Poughkeepsie

Aired December 18, 1997

Ross must choose between a great woman who lives far away and a local woman he isn't so keen on. Meanwhile, Monica hires Joey at her restaurant so she can show her staff who is in charge, Rachel regrets asking Chandler to set her up with his co-workers, and Phoebe writes a Christmas song for the group.

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: [playing guitar and singing] Went to the store, Sat on Santa's lap, Asked him to bring my friends, All kinds of crap, Said all you need is, To write them a song, Now you haven't heard it yet, So don't try to sing along, No, don't sing along, Monica, Monica Have a happy Hannukah, Saw Santa Claus, He said hello to Ross, And please tell Joey, Christmas will be snowy, And Rachel and Chandler, [indistinct]
Happy holidays, everybody!

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Quote from Joey

Joey: Hey, that must be why I got fired last week. Does this Orson Welles guy direct Burger King commercials?
Chandler: [silence] Yes.

Quote from Chandler

Ross: We were at the back of the train. I sat near the door so she'd have to pass by me if she wanted to switch cars. She was totally at my mercy.
Chandler: Were you so late because you were burying this woman?

Quote from Chandler

Ross: She seems great, but she's two and a half hours away.
Chandler: How can she be great if she's from Poughkeepsie? Okay, that joke would have killed in Albany.

Quote from Rachel

Chandler: I really wanted to take Kathy to this.
Rachel: At least you have somebody to miss stuff with. I hate being alone this time of year. Next it's Valentine's Day, then my birthday, then bang. Before you know it, they're lighting that damn tree again. I want somebody. [Gunther stands behind Rachel] You know, I want a man. [Gunther walks away] It doesn't even have to be a big relationship, you know. Just like a fling.
Chandler: Really? I didn't think girls ever just wanted a fling.
Rachel: Let me tell you, it's been a long time since I've been flung.

Quote from Chandler

Rachel: Okay. No accountants. And no one from, like, "legal." I don't like boring jobs.
Chandler: And Ross was like what? A lion tamer?

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: [playing guitar and singing] Happy Hanukkah, Monica, May your Christmas be snowy, Joey, Happy New Year, Chandler and Ross, Spin the dreidel, Rachel.
Rachel: Pheebs, that's great.
Phoebe: Oh, yay.
Rachel: But you know, Rachel doesn't rhyme with dreidel.
Phoebe: I know, but it's so hard. Nothing rhymes with your stupid name.

Quote from Joey

Joey: What are you talking about? Lots of things rhyme with Rachel. Bagel, mail, jail, bail, cable. Maypole.
Phoebe: All good. Thanks.

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: Do you, maybe, have a nickname that's easier to rhyme?
Monica: Didn't your dad used to call you "Pumpkin"?
Phoebe: Pumpkin? But did he ever call you, like, "Budolph"?

Quote from Rachel

Chandler: One guy, Patrick, you'll like him. He's really nice. He's funny. And he's a swimmer.
Rachel: Ooh. I like swimmers' bodies.
Chandler: His father invented that magnetic strip on credit cards.
Rachel: Oh, I like credit cards.

Quote from Phoebe

Rachel: So what does he do?
Chandler: He works in the fine foods division.
Rachel: Your company has a fine foods division?
Chandler: It's a big company. I don't-
Joey: Now, wait a second. You make food and robots?
Phoebe: No. No, the robots just work for them.

Quote from Ross

Ross: This is someone else. I can't decide between the two of them. The one from Poughkeepsie, though a two-hour train ride away, is pretty, really smart and a lot of fun. But this other girl, well she lives right uptown. She's just as pretty. I guess she's smart. She is not fun.

Quote from Ross

Phoebe: If she's no fun, why date her at all?
Ross: Well, I want to give her another chance. She lives so close. And, at the end of the date, she said something that if she was kidding, was very funny. On the other hand, if she wasn't kidding, she's not fun, she's stupid and kind of a racist.

Quote from Joey

Phoebe: Hey, how was your first day at the restaurant?
Joey: Damn it. [Joey runs out of Central Perk]

Quote from Joey

Monica: What the hell just happened?
Joey: I am so sorry. I was going to do it. But I was standing there with $327 in one hand and $238 in the other. And I was thinking it's been a long time since I had $327 plus $238.

Quote from Phoebe

Phoebe: [playing guitar and singing] Happy Hannukah, Chandler and Monica, Merry, merry-
Chandler: You know what, Pheebs? I'm not Jewish.
Phoebe: So, Ross doesn't decorate his tree with floss but you don't hear him complaining, do you?

Quote from Ross

Chandler: Bad dream?
Ross: I wasn't sleeping.
Chandler: So what was Phoebe's song about?
Ross: It's the one with the cat.

Quote from Ross

Ross: What?
Woman: I bet myself that you had beautiful eyes. Now that I see them, I win. We're at my stop. Would you like to have coffee?
Ross: Are we really in Montreal?
Woman: Yes, we are. So coffee?
Ross: Coffee sounds great. Wait. So you live in Montreal?
Woman: No, but it's only a two-hour ferry ride to Nova Scotia.


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