Adult Chris: [v.o.] While my mother got a dye job, I went to get a job-job. This was the first restaurant in Bed-Stuy without a bulletproof window. There was the bulletproof fish place... Then the bulletproof salad bar... And the bulletproof hot dog stand.
Mr. Fong: When can you start?
Chris: Tomorrow after school.
Mr. Fong: You're hired. The job pays minimum wage and all the rice you can eat.
Chris: I'll take it!
[Mr. Fong talks to Mrs. Fong in Chinese]
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Listen closely, and you'll learn how to say the "N" word in Chinese.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] The next day, I got $3.35 worth of new job.
Waitress: [Chinese: "You look like Lionel Richie."]
Adult Chris: [v.o.] About as much as you look like Yoko Ono.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] No matter what I did, it seemed like I was supposed to be doing something else.
Waiter: [Chinese: "You're sweeping my foot, fool!"]
Adult Chris: [v.o.] When I washed the floors...
Mr. Fong: Lionel Richie, set the tables.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] When I set the tables...
Mr. Fong: Lionel, organize the fortune cookies.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] When I organized the fortune cookies...
Mr. Fong: [claps] 5:30. Lionel Richie, go wash the dishes.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] He wouldn't talk to the real Lionel Richie like that.

Mr. Fong: What are you doing?
Chris: Oh, I finished the dishes, so I decided to start my homework.
Mr. Fong: No homework. You have work-work.
Chris: But Doc always let me start my homework.
Mr. Fong: Well, you are not at Doc's anymore. Go fix the menu numbers.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I was getting minimum wage and having minimum fun.

Greg: There's Mandy. I've decided to go with "hey." Can't figure out what I'm gonna do with my hair though. Should I part it to the side or go straight back?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Shave it off and start over.
Greg: Chris, wake up, I'm trying to tell you something.
Chris: What?
Greg: I've been having a hard time with my Mandy situation. This girl could be my future ex-wife, and I don't want to mess it up.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Greg still isn't over his parent's divorce.

Chris: That's not a real problem. You think you're having a hard time? You've got an obvious solution. Let me help you. Hey, Mandy... Greg wants to talk to you.
Mandy: Who's Greg?
Chris: [lifts Greg up] Him.
[Mandy smiles at Greg then walks away]
Chris: There, how's that?
Greg: You're embarrassing me. And when it comes to embarrassing myself in front of girls, I don't need any help.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I don't know. I think she kind of liked him.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] While a team of people worked on my mother's hair, I did the work of a team.
Mr. Fong: He who sleeps at work wakes up with a foot in the ass.
Chris: I wasn't sleeping. I was breathing.
Mr. Fong: Well, breathe while you work.
Chris: Mr. Fong, can I ask you a question?
Mr. Fong: All talk and no work makes Chris unemployed.
Chris: Well, I embarrassed my friend Greg in front of a girl, and now he won't talk to me. What should I do?
Mr. Fong: Here. [hands Chris a fortune cookie]
Chris: "Get back to work."
Mr. Fong: Now, hand out these delivery menus.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] People found the idea of getting food delivered in Bed-Stuy unbelievable.
Doc: Delivery in Bed-Stuy. Unbelievable.
Man: Delivery? In this neighborhood? Man, you crazy. I got kids over here I don't visit.

Doc: So how's it going out there, Chris? They're not working you too hard, are they?
Chris: No. It's great. Mr. Fong's cool. So how's it going here?
Doc: Good.
Chris: Good.
Doc: So, um... it's not too hard, you know, working over here by yourself?
James: Hey, Chris.
Chris: James, what are you doing here?
James: I work here. You think I'm just walking around in an apron carrying boxes for nothing? I'm trying to make some extra money. Man, there must be something wrong with you. This is a good job! I'm sure glad you quit. And tell Tonya I'm holding aside the bubble gum she likes.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] You're going to be holding your teeth if you go near my sister.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] Delivering in Bed-Stuy was an adventure.
[When Chris knocks on a door in a sketchy apartment building, a man opens a hatch in the door]
Man: Who is it?!
Chris: Hoo's.
Man: Who's what?
Chris: Hoo's delivery.
Man: Who--- I don't know!
Chris: Man, it's Chinese food!
Man: Oh. Thank you.
[Chris individually hands each piece of the order through the hatch]