Rochelle: Hey, girl, you got a bookmark?
Bernadette: No, thank you, I don't need one.
Rochelle: Oh, okay, Miss Evelyn Wood. I guess you're just gonna speed-read through the whole book.
Bernadette: And who are you?
Rochelle: Oh, who are you? With your magic book that just stays open to whatever page you leave it on.
Bernadette: Excuse me, I got to go.
Rochelle: Girl, you need to go with your cheap behind. You can't spend 25 cents on a bookmark? Did you spend all your money on cookies?
Bernadette: No! I did not spend my money on cookies, if it's any business of yours. I bought a book.
Rochelle: Oh, really? What's it about, crushing dreams? 'Cause that's exactly what you're doing.
Bernadette: Fine! I'll take one.
Rochelle: Thank you. Here you go.
Bernadette: Bye.
Rochelle: Lay off the cookies.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] But the one thing I always did for fun was go to the movies.
[flashback:]
Greg: Man, did you see Purple Rain?
Chris: [as Prie] Yes! "Why don't you stay a while, see how it's done?"
[flashback:]
Greg: Man, did you see Rambo?
Chris: Yeah. [as Stallone] "Do we get to win this time, sir?"
[flashback:]
Greg: Man, did you see Beverly Hills Cop?
Chris: [as Eddie Murphy] "Here, why don't you go ahead and take this banana?"

Chris: Greg, you know what? I think we can go see this movie.
Greg: How are we going to do that?
Chris: Cut school.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I ain't afraid of no ghosts.

Drew: Well, I just don't want you calling me "sweetie" and stuff like that. Last time you came, people made fun of me for a week.
Tonya: Why don't you just call him Joe Rockhead? That's what all my friends call him.
Drew: That's 'cause your friends smell like hot toilet bowls.
Tonya: You smell like underarm and booty crack.
Julius: Hey, stop it. We're eating.

Greg: Man, this is going to be so cool.
Chris: Wait, you never cut school before?
Greg: I've had perfect attendance since kindergarten.
Chris: Well, listen, if you don't want to do this, I understand. I wouldn't want to mess up your record.
Greg: Nah, it's cool.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Who knew that in the future this one unexplained absence would keep Greg from getting into Harvard?
Greg: If we get caught, I can just say it was your fault.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Same thing happened to Colin Powell.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] While we were cutting class, Greg was sweating like Lil' Kim in Sunday School.

Rochelle: Hey, baby, how's it going? [girls laugh] Oh, I'm sorry, sweetie. [girls laugh] I didn't mean to call you "baby."
Drew: Mom, just be quiet.
Rochelle: Honey, I- [girls laugh] What are y'all laughing at, with your hoop earrings on? Let's see if your mother's giggling when you're bringing home babies. [giggles mockingly] Who's laughing now, huh? It ain't funny no more, is it? Come on over here, girl. Buy some lemonade. It's good. My baby made it.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] The weirdest thing about being out of school on a school day was plain and simple: no kids.
Greg: This feels strange, like everyone's staring at us.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Almost like being a Black kid at an all-White school?

DMV Clerk: Number 25? [Julius places down his ticket] Can I help you?
Julius: Yes, you can help me. I'm here to renew my license.
DMV Clerk: This license is expired.
Julius: No, it's not. It expires today.
DMV Clerk: It expired today at 10:00 a.m. It is almost 2 o'clock.
Julius: Yeah, but I been standing in line since 7:45 a.m.
DMV Clerk: Are you one of those people that waits until the last minute to pay?
Julius: No, I'm one of those people who likes to wait until the last four hours and 15 minutes to pay!
DMV Clerk: Would you like a dime so you can call someone who cares?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I can't believe he didn't take the dime.

Chris: After getting away with cutting school today, I was thinking about seeing Brewster's Millions tomorrow.
Rochelle: How many times do I have to tell you to hang up your jacket when you come in?
[As Rochelle picks up Chris's jacket, a movie ticket stub falls out]
News Anchor: [on TV] I am standing here with Verdine White of legendary R&B; group Earth, Wind & Fire, who did an impromptu concert today for the lucky kids at Corleone Junior High. Verdine, how was it?
Verdine White: [on TV] It was really great. But the only sad thing, though, I heard there is a Black kid named Chris at the school, but he wasn't here.
News Anchor: [on TV] Well, that's too bad for Chris. Reporting live, I'm Julie Lancaster at Corleone Junior High. Back to you, Bob, at the studio.
Rochelle: So nothing happened in school today, huh?
Chris: Uh...
Rochelle: Who you gonna call?