Erin: It's just, it's pink, white and purple, Dennis.
Dennis: So?
Erin: Well, it should be red, white and blue.
Dennis: Says who?
Michelle: The rest of the world.
Clare: There's also quite a few stars missing.
Dennis: No there's not.
Clare: There's only 30 stars here, I mean, there should be 50, just because the stars represent states, so...
Dennis: Some of them left.
Erin: Some states left?
Dennis: That's right.

Gerry: What exactly is the plan over there?
Mary: They're trying to discover the location of the Presidential base camp.
Gerry: Does that mean which hotel he's staying in?
Mary: I think so, aye.

Jim: You still OK to drive us?
Gerry: What?
Joe: We need someone to stay in the car, in case things don't go to plan.
Joe: So a getaway driver, essentially.
Jim: We're talking worst-case scenario.
Gerry: We're talking no case scenario!

Sarah: Anything from Chelsea, girls?
Orla: Not a dickie bird, Mammy.
Erin: It's her loss. That wave machine is absolutely cracker.
Sarah: Ach well, at least yous were given the day off, sure, that's something.
Orla: We weren't given the day off, Mammy. We're playing truant.
Mary: Very good, Orla.
Sarah: Truant. What is she not, Mary?

Sarah: We heard about your wee divorce. Nightmare.
Cathy Maguire: Yeah, it was a difficult decision, but Paul, my ex, well, he just became so controlling.
Mary: Jesus. Really?
Cathy Maguire: He was unbearable towards the end, it was always, "Oh, Cathy, why did you stay out all night?" Or, "Who was that man you were having dinner with, Cathy?" He was very insecure.
Mary: Wonder why.
Cathy Maguire: I mean, James' father was the same. I just seem to attract the possessive, jealous types. I don't know what it is.
Sarah: The eyebrows.

Sarah: Here before you head, I got you a couple of American flags. They're on the sideboard there.
Erin: Thank you, Sarah.
Sarah: They're the new ones, so they are. They've only just brought them out.

Joe: [knocks on door] Bill? [continues knocking] You in there?
Jim: No sign of life, Joe.
Gerry: What are ye at?
Joe: I thought I told you to stay in the car.
Colm: Would it be worth maybe checking next door, Jim?
Gerry: Right, so the Clintons are staying in a taxi rank in the arsehole of nowhere is the thinking now, is it?
Jim: It is, Gerry, aye.
Gerry: Fantastic.

Michelle: Oi, wank features!
James: Michelle, please.
Michelle: "Goodbye, girls"? Wise the fuck up!
James: What do you want me to say?
Michelle: She'll let you down again, you do realise that?
James: She's asked me to be a partner in her business, actually, Michelle, so...
Michelle: Now it makes sense. She needs you to help flog her fucking stickers.
James: Self-adhesive labels.
Michelle: Free labour, that's what she's after.

Jenny: This is shocking. I mean, what is everybody playing at?
Aisling: What are we playing at?
Jenny: I'm sorry?
Aisling: Come on, Jenny, for once the world'll be watching us for all the right reasons.
Jenny: You'll get into trouble, Aisling.
Aisling: I don't care.

Sister Michael: What are you doing here?
Jenny: You told us we had to come in, Sister.
Sister Michael: Ah, for God's sake, Jenny. You need to learn when to push back.
Jenny: What?
Sister Michael: Get out of here. G'wan now.