Previous Episode Next Episode 

‘Rebound, Part 2’ Quotes Page 1 of 3

Cheers: Rebound, Part 2

302. Rebound, Part 2

Aired October 4, 1984

As Sam continues his therapy sessions with Frasier, Diane and the doc break the news that they're seeing each other.

Quote from Carla

Carla: Great, now I got to work another Saturday night by myself. Sam, you promised you weren't going to boink any more waitresses in this joint unless it was me.

Rate

Quote from Carla

Cliff: I just thank God I don't have an alcoholic personality.
Carla: You don't have a personality.
Cliff: Carla, I'm going to resist the temptation of hurling a rejoinder in your direction primarily out of the respect I bear for members of your gender.
Carla: Please make sure that's all you bare for members of my gender.

Quote from Cliff

Cliff: And then after being in the Everglades a couple of days, Seminole Indians found me and made me the honorary mail carrier of the tribe.

Quote from Sam

Diane: Frasier, listen to me. Sam needs my help in the bar. If you feel any spark of jealousy, please let me assure you I could side-by-side work with this man for the rest of my life and feel nothing.
Sam: Work? Hell, I could live in the same house with her and never be tempted.
Diane: I could sleep in the same bed and get nothing but a good night's rest.
Sam: I could get out of jail after twelve years, serve on a ship with an all-male crew for another four, be dropped off on a desert island for another three, eating nothing but raw oysters, and if Diane were to walk out of the surf naked one day, all I'd want from her would be the hockey scores.
Diane: And you wouldn't even get that.

Quote from Sam

Diane: How is your romantic life going, Sam?
Sam: I'm dating a girl right now that I think may just turn out to be the woman I've been waiting for all my life.
Diane: Oh, well. [raises a glass]
Julie: Sam Malone! You went out with my sister! How did you think that wasn't going to get back to me? I have had just about as much as I can take from you! As far as I'm concerned, you never existed. [exits]
Sam: Well, the search continues.
Frasier: Swim, Sam, swim.

Quote from Cliff

Cliff: [v.o.] Last week on Cheers, yours truly, Cliff Clavin, postman extraordinaire and happy wanderer, returned from a vacation in the paradisaical state of Florida. It was an invigorating and magnificent experience. I'd like to tell you all about it but certain parties insist I fill you in on the rest of the story, so... Diane and Sam, as you may know, had a little falling by the wayside. After they went separate ways, Sam went back to his old ones. I didn't happen to get the license of the wagon Sam fell off, but back to the bottle he went. Diane, on her side, went what we euphemistically call [makes goofy noises]... and spent a little time in a hospital in the country. After she got out, Coach talked her into coming into Cheers to try and talk some sense into Sam. She talked him into seeing a psychiatrist of her acquaintance. Sam agreed, not knowing that the said shrink and said Diane were dating steadily, and rumor has it, heavily. Sam, in fact, is laboring under the misconception that Diane still carries the torch for him. And Diane actually thinks that Sam is the torch bearer in this situation. You know something? I think I may have the wrong batch of slides here. These are my snaps of FLA. Ah, well, you all know what Sam and Diane look like. But a lot of you poor, pasty wretches have never seen the old Sunshine State. What we're looking at here is- Hey! All right, who pulled the plug? Very funny, wise guy. Now, come on!

Quote from Sam

Diane: Yes, well, down to business. Sam, there's something I've been keeping from you and I've got to tell you and tell you now.
Sam: Well, there's something I need to say to you and I think I ought to go first.
Diane: No, no, I think maybe I should go first.
Sam: Maybe.
Both: [in unison] I'm over you. You're over me? Well ,you don't think that I still- Well, you've got your- [both laugh] You thought I- Well, so did you. We keep doing it.

Quote from Diane

Diane: If Frasier approves, I'll stick around, and help you through your waitress problem.
Sam: Whoa, wait a second here. You mean to tell me you're actually coming back to work here?
Diane: I'll take it until a better job comes along. Cleaning up after rodeos, for instance.

Quote from Norm

Coach: That's it, folks. Closing it up.
Norm: Night, Coach.
Coach: Good night, guys.
Cliff: So, Normie, you want to stop off and get a bite to eat?
Norm: Come on, Cliff, I have a wife to go home to.
Cliff: Oh, that's all right. We could stop by and pick her up. I haven't met her yet.
Norm: I don't think so. Not tonight.
Cliff: Oh, oh, wait a minute. Who are you ashamed of me or her?
Norm: A little of both, I guess.

Quote from Frasier

Sam: Look, I haven't had a drink in ten days. I know I've got a problem, but I'm going to AA and I really think I'm going to be OK.
Frasier: No, you're better than OK, Sam. You're abundantly human.
Sam: Didn't you just say I made you sick a minute ago?
Frasier: I was confronting you, Sam. Forget about a minute ago. I am now telling you that you're abundantly human.
Sam: Well, great, great. Because I really think I'm going be able to handle this now.
Frasier: I don't.
Sam: I'm abundantly human, remember?
Frasier: Sam, don't you see what I'm doing here? I'm putting you on an emotional pendulum.
Sam: Oh, I don't want to be on an emotional anything. I just want to quit.

Quote from Frasier

Frasier: Sam! Sam! There's that word again. Quit. Do you realize that you keep saying it? Could you stop saying it you wanted to?
Sam: Frasier?
Frasier: Sam, I know a quiet, peaceful little place in the country. I could get you in for the weekend. Lovely grounds, nice food, dress is casual. In fact, your tie and belt will be confiscated.
Sam: Frasier, I'm not going to a hospital. I am not having any more sessions. We're through. That's it. Now get the hell out.
Frasier: Sam! We did it!
Sam: Did what?
Frasier: You're a whole person, Sam. Really, I mean that.
Sam: I am?
Frasier: You stood up to me and took control. You're no longer a man who needs to run away from problems, who needs to need to drink, or needs to spend his weekends at a hospital bombed on Thorazine. Goodbye, Sam. Be well.

Quote from Frasier

Sam: Oh, Frasier, wait a minute.
Frasier: Sam, you must break this attachment. Swim, Sam, swim.
Sam: No, no, Frasier, no. I just want you to tell me what you think put Diane in the "ha ha house".
Frasier: Well, I'm not her doctor, and even if I were, I couldn't discuss it.
Sam: Ah, it doesn't matter. I know she went nuts cos I kicked her out of here.
Frasier: By the way, Sam, I don't think you should use the word "nuts" when discussing Diane.
Sam: Well, you've met her. Give me a better one.
Frasier: Bonkers. [both laugh] You see, you don't need alcohol to have fun.
Frasier: In my profession there's no such thing as a closed door.
Sam: That explains how Diane got out.
Frasier: [laughs] You know, as long as you hang on to that sense of humor, I don't think you can ever go completely astray.

Quote from Carla

Carla: Hey, Frasier. Say hello to all your loons for me.
Frasier: Carla, why do you keep building walls between yourself and everyone else?
Carla: Have you taken a good look at everyone else?
Frasier: Touche.

Quote from Sam

Sam: Diane, rest assured I have no feelings left for you. Nothing.
Diane: I assure you I feel less than nothing for you.
Sam: Then there's nothing really left to say.
Diane: There is one other thing you should know. It's kind of important. There's another man in my life and he's someone you know.
Sam: Really? Who?
Diane: Frasier and I have been lovers for several weeks.
Sam: Ooh.
Diane: What do you mean, ooh?
Sam: No, I'm sorry. I just got a little mental picture there. It took me by surprise.

Quote from Diane

Diane: Frasier is a consulting psychiatrist at Golden Brook, though he wasn't my therapist.
Coach: How did you two get together?
Diane: I was playing croquet on the North Lawn one beautiful morning. It's a game I learned during my stay there and I got quite good at it.
[flashback to Diane bickering with an elderly woman as they play croquet:]
Diane: I saw you do that. You are a naughty, naughty girl. Very naught I saw you do it. Admit it. Be a grown-up.
Diane: [v.o.] It was amazing to me how I could just lose myself in the flow of the game.
Diane: Now, I'm annoyed.
Diane: [v.o.] I found when I played with someone of equal ability, it gave me an appreciation for the nobler aspects of competition.
Diane: What is this business?
Old Woman: I'm not going to play with you any more!
Diane: Fine, then go. Oh! Oh!
Diane: [v.o.] Frasier happened by in the midst of this spirited contest and he stopped to correct a flaw in my swing. My opponent on that particular day was as crafty a strategist as l. We really brought out the best in each other.
Frasier: Girls! Ladies!
Diane: [v.o.] Frasier remained not only to watch my game, but to good-naturedly arbitrate a close call for us.
I must admit that under the attentive gaze of a distinguished doctor, I lost some of my concentration on the game itself.
Frasier: Okay, who's your doctor?
[present:]
Diane: Who would have guessed that a leisurely game of croquet would provide me with such a trophy?
Frasier: Indeed.
Sam: That's quite a story.

Page 2 
 Previous Episode Next Episode 
  View another episode