Erin: I am really excited for Michael either way. Because if Holly chooses to be with him, he will be so, so happy. And if not, he'll be avoiding the biggest mistake of his life!

Holly: Oh, I get it. Everybody knows about the ultimatum.
Kelly: Yes, I told everyone.
Holly: [sticking both ring fingers up] Ha ha, ha ha!
Kevin: Hey, right back at you, bitch!

Dwight K. Schrute: Wait, it's that easy? That's not a resolution, that's just... something I want to do. Okay, fine. I can do that... [makes trumpet sound] My resolution is meet a loose woman.
Angela: Oh, God.
Andy: That's a good one.
Dwight K. Schrute: Yeah.
Andy: You know what, that's my new one. I'm taking that one, too.

Holly: We're gonna be just fine. You know how you say something over and over and the words start to sound weird? Going to be just fine... just fine... just fine... just fine...

Michael Scott: [filming video] Michael, I know what you're thinking. Holly is engaged to another man, and you want to kill yourself. It may seem like a good idea, but it's not.
Erin: [giggles] Snot. Sorry, it sounded like you said it's snot. I am so sorry.
Michael Scott: Okay, so killing yourself. [laughs] I was just thinking about snot.

Michael Scott: Happy! Happy, happy, happy, happy!
Michael Scott: [on video] Whoa, whoa, whoa, okay, calm down, breathe.
Michael Scott: I'm trying!
Michael Scott: [on video] I said breathe!
Michael Scott: I'm trying!
Michael Scott: [on video] Wait a second, are you listening to music?
Michael Scott: What?
Michael Scott: [on video] Shut that off!
Michael Scott: I'm not listening to music!
Michael Scott: [on video] Fine, just go crazy for a little while! Lookin' good! You're lookin' good. [roping Michael in] Oh, I gotcha! I gotcha! I'm pulling you back! Michael dance off!
Michael Scott: Go! Oh, that's nice.
Michael Scott: [on video] Go!
Michael Scott: Me? Okay.
Erin: Go!
Michael Scott: [on video] Nice! We're gonna calm down later.
Michael Scott: I'm good.
Erin: Oh, yeah!
Michael Scott: Oh my God! [sprays champagne on Erin]

Angela: Yes.
Pam: Make time for romance!
Oscar: Who's the senator?
Angela: My boyfriend.
Oscar: Oh, you mean the state senator. I'm sorry, I was confused, because you accidentally wrote 'the senator'.

Michael Scott: Holly doesn't seem to be engaged, but she's talking to AJ like she is. I can't figure it out. Do you think she's already dating a different AJ?
Pam: I don't think so.
Michael Scott: When you broke it off with Roy, did you still tell him you loved him?
Pam: No.
Michael Scott: But you did still love him.
Pam: I'm not... I'm not going to have...
Michael Scott: Do you love him now?
Pam: No! Just talk to her.
Michael Scott: No. She'd just resent me. Or worse! She would think of me as her friend. [disgusted voice] Oh, hi friend! Bleuch.

Dwight K. Schrute: What'd you get?
Darryl: A book about oceans.
Dwight K. Schrute: Oh, really? What else? Let me see.
Darryl: No, that's, uh, porn. Pornography. Old lady... nasty... porn.

Andy: Hey, there's a roller rink across the street! There's always chicks at the rink.
Darryl: What kind of chicks are you going to meet there?
Andy: I don't know. Single moms at a skating party. Sweet sixteen, ten year reunion parties.
Dwight K. Schrute: Chicks fall down, need help getting back up.
Andy: Roller derby practice!
Darryl: We're going skating.