Michael Scott: January 3, 2011. A day which will live "in-famously". Holly Partridge Flax, otherwise known as Holly. Otherwise otherwise known as a living, breathing angel, is engaged to another man. This is freaking me out. I- Okay, let's just switch to the happy video, okay? No, no, no, no, let's push through. We'll do this.

Michael Scott: Today will either be the best or the worst day of my life. Holly gave AJ an ultimatum. He either proposes by New Year's or they break up. Now, if she's engaged, I'm gonna go crazy, and I'm gonna start attacking people. If she's not engaged, in all honesty, I may just burn this whole place to the ground out of happiness. Either way, I am going to need some talking down. And nobody talks me down like myself in a video talking me down.

Angela: Good morning.
Pam: Hey, guys! Fun thing. The index cards on your desk are resolution cards. You write your New Year's resolution on them, I'll collect them, and then display them on... da-da-da-da-da! This! Resolution board.
Dwight K. Schrute: Wow. Did your baby draw that?
Angela: The glitter is blinding.
Phyllis: I think it's good.
Pam: It's gonna be fun.
[aside to camera:]
Pam: I recently met Sue, the office administrator at Vance Refrigeration. She has this awesome wall full of fun initiatives and morale boosters and stuff. Sue just goes for it, she's awesome.

Erin: Okay, champagne.
Michael Scott: Happy.
Erin: Sponge.
Michael Scott: Sad. To soak up my tears.
Erin: Gummi bears and gummi worms.
Michael Scott: Bears sad, worms happy. Come on, Erin.
Erin: Ukulele's happy?
Michael Scott: Sad, something to break.
Erin: Chocolates.
Michael Scott: For you, job well done.
Erin: Thank you! And two bottles of scotch.
Michael Scott: Both sad.

Pam: Hey, Dwight, I'm collecting resolution cards.
Dwight K. Schrute: Not doing that.
Pam: Why not?
Dwight K. Schrute: I've achieved plenty and there's no better than the best.

Pam: The goal of this meeting is to get everybody excited about their resolutions! Who's been good about their resolutions so far? Erin. Tell us about it.
Erin: Well, my goal was to learn a new word every single day. And I must say that it is going immensely.

Erin: One, two, three. [does cartwheel] I did it! I did a cartwheel!
Creed: [bleep] you! [bleep] you! God!

Michael Scott: Hello! Oh, somebody's got a new phone!
Holly: Yeah.
Michael Scott: That is neat.
Holly: I got it for Christmas. I'm so out of my league here.
Michael Scott: [as E.T.] E.T. phone Holly. Holly like phone?
Holly: [as E.T.] Holly misses old phone.
Michael Scott: [as E.T.] Why?
Holly: [as E.T.] New phone is confusing. Gets bad reception.
Michael Scott: [as E.T.] Bummer.
Holly: [as E.T.] Bummer.
Michael Scott: [as E.T.] Reese's Pieces.
Holly: [as E.T.] Reese's Pieces?
Kelly: Oh, God, please stop!

Andy: Drink less caffeine. That's a good one, Pam. Here's mine.
Pam: Learn to cook for one!
Andy: Yeah. I love cooking, but I always find myself throwing out half the food that I prepare, so... two years is time to just start preparing the right amount of food for the right number of people, which is one.
Pam: Well, maybe you'll meet someone.
Andy: No, some people don't just meet someone. I'm fine with it. Really. This is not a pity party. It's not a party at all. It's just sad.

Phyllis: Hey, want some company?
Erin: Want some company?
Holly: Oh, sure. Have a seat. How were your breaks?
Phyllis: Oh, really good, I went to Portugal.
Erin: I went to Portugal.
Holly: Oh, wow... you went together?
Phyllis: No.
Erin: No.