Michael Scott: Spamster!
Pam: Pam, plus Spam, plus-
Michael Scott: Hamster.
Pam: Right.

Michael Scott: Welcome back. How was your vacation?
Pam: It was great.
Michael Scott: Yeah? Did you get lucky? Boink.

Michael Scott: I cannot believe a pipe burst and left that there.
Toby: That's no burst pipe.
Michael Scott: How do you know that?

Creed: Hey, guys. Somebody making soup?

Jim: What? I did not do that. That sounds disgusting.

Ryan: [laughing] It wasn't me. [seriously] Uh, it wasn't me. It was not me.

Michael Scott: Ed Truck. Yuck. Ed Truck was the manager before me. Horrible. He hated fun. It was like, "Oh, Ed Truck is walking toward us, so stop having fun. Start pretending to do work." What a jerk. He's You know what? I swore to myself that if I ever got to walk around the room as manager, people would laugh when they saw me coming and would applaud as I walked away.

Kelly: I'm serious. My closet doors will not shut. I mean, it only takes so long to measure to make sure that clothes will hang up. 'cause aren't all hangers, like, that big? So I don't understand why the closet engineer didn't think of that. So, now I'm doing this new thing where I just leave piles of clothes on the floor and I walk around the piles to get an outfit-

Kelly: Beyonce, pink the color, Pink the person, hot dogs, basically anything that is awesome. Snow cones-

Michael Scott: Sales rules!
Dwight K. Schrute: Yes!
Michael Scott: Yeah! Yeah!
Dwight K. Schrute: Should we help them pick up their stuff?
Michael Scott: No, no, no, no. We don't do that. We don't do that.
Dwight K. Schrute: Okay.
Michael Scott: Watch out, Pam. You're next.
Pam: You're gonna throw my things on the ground?
Michael Scott: Maybe.