Jim: Whoa, Stanley! Did you just come back from burning down a rival nightclub?
Stanley: Laugh it up, Halpert. I'm in Florida for a month without my family. I'm gonna enjoy this. Want to get in? You can work the iPod.
Jim: Yes.
Stanley: You're a nice guy, Jim, but you have no idea how to vacation. Find some Kenny Loggins.
Jim: Loggins and Messina.
Stanley: Did I say Messina?

Erin: Hey, wake up. Let's have some fun. We're in Florida now.
Ryan: Hey, you. I'm so glad this is happening. I actually came to your door twice last night. Come on in, the water's fine. [sees Dwight and the cameras] Oh, not cool!

Nellie: Everyone, we have a very special guest. He turned an idea into a store, into hundreds of stores. I give you Wally Amos, founder of Famous Amos Cookies. [cheers, claps]
Wally Amos: Aloha, aloha, aloha. So I hear you're all looking to bake up some dough in the sales game. Well, back when I was regular Amos-
Stanley: What's under the cloth?
Wally Amos: We'll get to that.
Todd: Cookies. Bet you anything it's cookies.
Wally Amos: It's cookies. Let me- let me finish my speech first.
Nellie: Ah, we get the gist. It's just success and effort, isn't it? So just, don't be coy, make with the cookies!

Dwight K. Schrute: Shopping habits are both seasonal and cyclical. What does this mean?
Ryan: I can field this one.
Dwight K. Schrute: No, sit down. "Seasonal." Well, the Christmas shopping season is certainly a busy one, back-to-school is, as well, and in early summer it seems to slow down a bit, but shopping is also cyclical. The menstrual cycle determines every choice a woman makes. You see, during ovulation, a woman's only goal is to get pregnant, and during menses, she is sad that she has failed. And how does the woman console herself? Shopping. Shopping. Just- Jim, could you fetch me some ice chips? Thank you. Just gonna... take a... brief pause at this point. [Jim gives Dwight a bowl of ice chips] Thank you. [Dwight sticks his head in the bowl] Oh, God. Next slide.

Dwight K. Schrute: Hey, hey, hey, hey! Wake up! [Erin kicks him] Ow! Why are you sleeping that way?
Erin: Oh. I was reading the mattress tag and I fell asleep.

Dwight K. Schrute: I'll have a bottle of the antacid. Also, I want to get a souvenir for my son, but his mother doesn't acknowledge my paternity. Do you have anything for that? Also, I want it to have a Florida feel.
Saleswoman: What does he like?
Dwight K. Schrute: Power.

Dwight K. Schrute: Okay, Twiggy, that's enough. Get in the car.
Erin: Hey, are you okay?
Dwight K. Schrute: I'm fine, okay? It's just stress. You know, 'cause I care about this project. And frankly the fact that none of you are vomiting or diarrheal right now I find very alarming.
Erin: Who says none of us are diarrheal?

Cathy: Um, it might be fun if each store had a different theme, like a beach one, a winter one, a jungle one.
Nellie: No, not a big fan of the winter aesthetic.
Cathy: Well that was just one idea. It doesn't have to be winter.
Nellie: Oh, no, it does. It does. It has to be winter, and I reject it. So I drew up a design concept. Probably gonna be rubbish, right? Would you like to look at it? Just so you could laugh at it.
Erin: Yeah!

Dwight K. Schrute: [on the phone] Yes, a complete inability to pass gas, pervert. Ugh, yeah, it's tender. It can't be appendicitis, I eat more than enough bacon. Okay, what poison mimics the symptoms of appendicitis? Oh, you don't know? Hold on. [to Jim] What kind of poison did you use?
Jim: Dwight, I didn't poison you. I was kidding.
Dwight K. Schrute: [back on the phone] Yeah, I'm gonna need an ambulance. Hold on, I have the address in my phone. [sees chart on screen] Hold on. Hold on one second. [to Nellie] Uh, quick question. Vice president, uh, who is that? There's no name listed.
Nellie: Is there not? Maybe I'm just waiting for someone to wow me. [winks]
Emergency Operator: Sir? Sir, where should we send the ambulance?
Dwight K. Schrute: Send it to the frickin' moon, idiot.

Jim: I've spent so much of my life telling myself "Please, don't end up like Stanley," and now I'm wondering if I even have what it takes.