Fingerlakes Guy: I want the job. I really do. It's just, the rest of my family's in the Fingerlakes right now. I'm supposed to be in the Fingerlakes right now. I told them I was on a hike; snuck away to do this interview. I gotta get back pretty soon; they'll worry. People disappear in the Fingerlakes.
[also to camera:]
Dwight K. Schrute: I will run this branch, or I will destroy this branch, or... [shrugs] I don't know. Something always works out.

Creed: [on the phone] You remind me so much of my fourth-biggest client.
Pam: [in high-pitched, damsel-like voice] Is that right?
Creed: I think you two should meet.
Pam: Well, okay!
Creed: Hey, Jordana! Patch my ninth- and fourth-biggest clients together. [Pam puts down phone and picks it back up]
Pam: [a comedic male voice] Hello!
Pam: [damsel-like voice] Hello!
Pam: Hi, how are ya?
Pam: Oh, I'm good! Don't you just love paper, and things about paper!
Pam: Hey, are you single? This seems like a love connection to me!
Creed: It's Kismet!

Jo: Let's get Kelly in here to take his place.
Jim: Um, why Kelly?
Jo: 'Cause Gabe's tall and weak. She's short and strong. I'm doing an opposites thing.

Jo: Who's this fella? Went to Cornell. What's wrong with him?
Gabe: How much time do you have? Sales ability? None. Integrity? See sales ability. [makes a "zero" hand gesture]
Jo: And that's your unbiased opinion.
Gabe: Yes, it is.
Jo: So it's not relevant that he took the receptionist away from you?
Gabe: Oh, Jo. Jo, I'm disappointed in you. Some people let personal things into the workpl- Is she with him? Because I thought that she was...
Jo: Gabe! Ugh. You got all close to these people. Got involved in their lives. Let's get you back to Florida. We'll figure out something for you.
Gabe: That sounds like a promotion.
Jo: It's not.

Jim: Okay, seems like everybody has an opinion. So, who else? Anybody?
Kevin: Do you mean it? Anybody? Are you sure?
Jim: [sighing] I suppose I am.
Kevin: Okay. Well, what do I want in a manager? Let me see. [walks slowly across the office] What do I want?
Oscar: I don't think he meant, that-
Kevin: So now anyone gets to talk at any times?
Oscar: Go ahead.
Kevin: What do I want? ... I'm looking for someone... who... [smiles] Everyone is listening to me.

Dwight K. Schrute: Jo, may I speak to you for a second?
Jo: Or what? You gonna shoot me?
Dwight K. Schrute: [laughs] Oh, I enjoy laughing at my mistakes, because I've learned so much from them. I'd like to be interviewed for the position.
Jo: I'll interview you right now.
Dwight K. Schrute: Okay.
Jo: Question 1: Ever shot a gun in the office?
Dwight K. Schrute: It's complicated.
Jo: Yeah, but see... it's not.

Angela: How odd, a very unusual phone call from the Senator's office. The Senator wants me to have lunch with him at The Botanical Gardens.
Kevin: The Botanical Gardens, Scranton's hidden gem. Don't eat any berries you don't recognize.

Andy: Tuna, you're completely sane.
Jim: Thank you.
Andy: Who do you like for the job? Is there anyone who maybe was a little underwhelming at first, but now seems like a safe, if not slightly unexciting, choice?

Pam: It's gorgeous, Angela.
Kelly: Yeah, I actually know about nice rings and it is gorgeous.
Meredith: Wow.
Angela: It's a little flashy. I mean, what am I? Naomi Judd?

Meredith: Tell us the freaking story.
Kevin: Yeah, tell us a story.
Angela: Okay. He took me to the replica of Monet's Japanese bridge, and then he put this flower behind my ear, which normally, I would hate, 'cause it's so civil rightsy. Then he got down on one knee, and he said, will you be a Senator's wife?
Pam: [laughing] Oh-ho-ho! He talked about himself in the third person?
Angela: Yes, Pam. Not everyone is as informal as you and Jim. [imitating Jim's voice] Oh, hey Pam, dude, whatever, wanna marry me?
Pam: That's not accurate.