Jan: Michael? Yeah? Are the cameras in there with you, in your office?
Michael Scott: No. They are not. ... Yes, they are.
[Jan hangs up]
Michael Scott: That's my girlfriend.

Kevin: I heard they made out and had sex.
Oscar: I heard they just made out. That's it.
Kevin: Well, I heard they made out and had sex.
Angela: Don't talk about it. Office romances are nobody's business but the people involved.
Kevin: Romances?

Michael Scott: Pam, I have ideas on a daily basis, I know I do. I have a clear memory of telling people my ideas.
Is there any chance that you wrote any of my ideas down in a folder, like an idea folder?
Pam: Sorry.

Michael Scott: I'm a little confused because first it's, like, all kissy-kissy and then it's, like, all regret because, "Oh, I regret that. But, wait, I'm still gonna call you. But we're just gonna talk business, and I may come down there and fire you if you don't do your job. But what were we talking about when we first kissed? Business."

Michael Scott: Can I ask you a question?
Jan: No.
Michael Scott: This is a business question. It's nothing personal, I promise
Jan: Fine.
Michael Scott: Are you wearing a new perfume today?
Jan: How is that a business question?
Michael Scott: Well, you're wearing it at the office, and It I'm sorry, no offense, but it's really sexy.
Jan: Please don't smell me, Michael.

Michael Scott: All right, next suggestion. Next suggestion. "You need to do something about your B.O."
Dwight K. Schrute: "You need to do something about your B.O."
Michael Scott: Okay. Now, I don't know who this suggestion is meant for, but it's more of a personal suggestion.
And it's not an office suggestion. Far be it from me to use this as a platform to embarrass anybody.
Toby: Aren't the suggestions meant for you?
Michael Scott: Well, Toby, if by me you are inferring that I have B.O., then I would say that that is a very poor choice of words.
Creed: Michael, he wasn't inferring, he was implying. You were inferring.
Michael Scott: Was I, Creed? Okay, well, you know what I am implying is that when we're on an elevator together, I should maybe take the stairs. Because talk about stank. Not that I would ever say something like that in public, and I never have, and I never will. I just think it's something that we should all be aware of, okay? Now that we've learned this, let's continue.

Michael Scott: See, this is good. We're learning and we're figuring some stuff out. "You need to do something about your coffee breath." Okay, no!
Dwight K. Schrute: "You need to do something-"
Michael Scott: Shut up, shut up, shut up, Dwight. Okay. I don't think you people are grasping the concept of the suggestion box.
Angela: Sometimes you talk to us real close.
Michael Scott: [his hand pressed against his face, keeping his mouth tight] Yeah? Is that hard for you? All right. Well.
Angela: Well, when you have coffee breath it's hard.
Michael Scott: I'll work on that.

Michael Scott: Next suggestion.
Dwight K. Schrute: "Next suggestion."
Michael Scott: "Don't-" Okay, that's blank. Don't- Just put it
Dwight K. Schrute: "Don't sleep with your boss." Do you think this is referring to you boning Jan?

Michael Scott: I just want to know, from the horse's mouth, what is the dealio?
Jim: You know, Michael-
Michael Scott: Am I too short?
Jim: Michael, it has nothing to do with your looks, okay? It's your personality. I mean, you're obnoxious, and rude, and stupid, and you do have coffee breath, by the way. And I don't agree about the B.O., but you are very, very inconsiderate.
Michael Scott: Really?
Jan: Really. You're- You're a great guy, okay?
Michael Scott: I appreciate that, thank you.
Jan: And you were very sweet. And you stayed up with me and talked to me and cried with me, and I appreciate that.
Michael Scott: No, I didn't. I was- I don't cry.
Jan: But I just am not in a place right now where I'm looking for a relationship. So, we can still work together, we can still be friends, but... Okay?

Michael Scott: Jan is not in a place where she feels she can have a relationship right now, and it doesn't matter how great a guy I am. And that is all I needed. I'm good. I can go home now.