Michael Scott: Kevin, I have something for you. [holds up a drawing of Kevin as a pig eating pizza] You know who that is? Don't be a caricature, Kevin. Never be a caricature. How did that feel when I tore that up?
Kevin: Better?
Michael Scott: Good. Stand up. You will be thin. You won't drool over pizza like an animal anymore.
Kevin: But, I-
Michael Scott: You will find love.
Kevin: Michael, I'm pretty much okay with who I am now.
Michael Scott: Don't be. You should never settle for who you are.

Michael Scott: Oscar, Oscar, Oscar. Oscar, you are a-
Andy: Michael, I just lost Porter hardware! I just- I lost 'em.
Michael Scott: Okay, you know what? Just do your best, buddy.

Michael Scott: Was it just me, or did you think we were gonna have sex at some point?
Angela: It was just you.
Michael Scott: How would you have wanted to do it?
Angela: I- Don't.
Michael Scott: Okay, you know what? Inappropriate, because I am engaged happily, and you, you have landed yourself a senator.
Oscar: State senator.
Michael Scott: Mm-hmm. Bravo.
Oscar: Brava.
Michael Scott: Bra-?

Angela: Do you want to see some pictures? I just got these.
Michael Scott: Sure.
Angela: Um, these are... Okay, um, this is us at the theater. Oh, and, uh, antiquing. Oh, rollerblading.
Michael Scott: Rollerblading. Who's that? Who's that guy?
Angela: Oh, that's Thomas, Robert's aide.
Michael Scott: I guess this could be the one, huh?
Angela: Yeah. Yeah. [Oscar shakes his head no]

Oscar: Oh, um, Michael. Uh, where do you want your last paycheck sent?
Michael Scott: Last paycheck?
Oscar: Do you have an address yet in Colorado?
Michael Scott: No.
Oscar: What town do Holly's parents live in?
Michael Scott: I'm not sure. Um, Mountainton, I think.
Kevin: Sounds beautiful.

Michael Scott: Yeah, so I know I told everybody that tomorrow is my last day, but I'm- I'm gonna be leaving tonight. I, uh, head to the airport at 4:00. And, uh, I have said good-bye to half of them.

Michael Scott: Ahem, Kelly? Kelly? Kelly?
Kelly: What?
Michael Scott: If I just went away right now, would that be the best gift that I could give you?
Kelly: Yes, please. Please go away and stop using that weird, slow voice.

Pam: So Michael said we can do whatever we want cake-wise. What do we want?
Meredith: Erotic.
Angela: See? This is what happens. You can't let a street dog into the house.

Erin: I really think you should leave.
Gabe: Someday, you are going to tell our grandchildren about how their grandfather won you back in a women's room.

DeAngelo: Okay. So what's our approach? You a veteran? Do I have a month to live? You gonna get married tomorrow? What? Hmm?
Andy: I thought we'd just talk about our customer service and exceptional paper quality.
DeAngelo: That's stupid.
Andy: Well, what do I know?
DeAngelo: I know. What you know? We gotta get psyched up. Okay, guy? Let's get psyched. Is there an animal shelter on the way?
Andy: Yeah.
DeAngelo: Awesome! Ani-ani-shelto. Here we come. Andy, do you know how to high-five?
Andy: Yeah.
DeAngelo: 'Cause if you do, now's the time.
Andy: All right.
DeAngelo: Not while I'm driving.