Michael Scott: May I have your attention, please? I have an announcement. Mr. Dwight Schrute and I just returned from a wonderful stroll together, and although I probably will never do it again, I had fun. I really had fun with my best friend, Dwight.
Oscar: These aren't announcements.
Michael Scott: Yes, they are. You just don't care about the information.

Jim: You're talking to Dwight Schrute, the biggest Wonka fan I know. I mean, you've been talking about that movie for years.
Michael Scott: What?
Jim: You know what, I even made fun of you when you dressed up as Willy Wonka to pitch this idea, and for that I apologize.
Dwight K. Schrute: Apology rejected.
Pam: Thanks so much for helping the company. [hugs Dwight]
Dwight K. Schrute: Oh, thanks, Pam.
Creed: Good work, kid.
Dwight K. Schrute: Thanks, old man.
David: This- This is great. Oh, okay, I wanna get you on the horn with the marketing people in New York. They should meet you.
Dwight K. Schrute: Great idea. Yeah.

Michael Scott: David. David. David. Could I be part of the meeting also?
David: You probably have too much to do around here. I don't want to, uh, take up your time with another meeting.
Jim: Yeah, let's face it. This meeting sounds like it's Wonka fans only. He's never seen the movie.

David: What is going on here?
Michael Scott: Okay, here's what happened, David. It was all my idea. You called me and you were really angry at me and I got scared, so I had Dwight take the fall, but now it turns out that it's a great idea, and Dwight will not confess. Can you believe that?
David: No, no.
Dwight K. Schrute: It is my idea.
Michael Scott: Oh, how dare you?
Dwight K. Schrute: It is my idea. I'm filled with good ideas. Thousands of good ideas!
Michael Scott: You are? Good ideas, huh? Did you come up with toilet buddy? It's a net, a circular net you put inside the toilet to catch your change and your wallet from falling into the toilet? Formerly known as toilet guard?
Dwight K. Schrute: Horse boat! A canoe built around your horse so you can go from riding to water travel without slowing down. Horse boat!
Michael Scott: Toilet sponge. It's a hollowed out sponge that is more absorbent and softer than toilet paper. I have a lot of toilet ideas.
Dwight K. Schrute: 'Cause they're easy.
Michael Scott: They're not easy.
Dwight K. Schrute: Toilet piano bench.
Michael Scott: Women's urinal! Everybody has to go to the bathroom.

David: Is this true, Dwight? Is this true?
Dwight K. Schrute: Yes, it's Michael's idea that he forced on me on threat of death!
Michael Scott: Thank you.
David: I don't know. What do you want me to do now? What am I supposed to do now?
Michael Scott: Well, David, I will be honest with you. I do want the credit without any of the blame.

Michael Scott: My golden ticket idea, okay? Why would anyone think that this is my golden ticket idea? There's a one in thirteen chance that this could be anybody's golden ticket idea.

David: Okay, I am going back to New York. Pam, do me a favor, don't send me those notes.
Pam: Okay.
David: I am gone.

Pam: Good morning, Michael.
Michael Scott: Oh, no, no, no. I am not Michael. I am Willy Wonka!
Pam: Good morning, Mr. Wonka. Here are your messages.
Michael Scott: Why thank you very much. Oh, what are those? Tell me please!
Pam: Jelly beans.
Michael Scott: Oh, no, no, no. They are not just ordinary jelly beans, little girl. These are extraordinary jelly beans!

Kevin: I think I should call her.
Andy: No! No! No!
Kevin: Why is it so bad for me to call and ask her to lunch today?
Andy: You're making it too easy for her. You're just conveying, "Oh, I like you just the way you are."
Kevin: But I do like her just the way she is.
Andy: Well, that's not what we agreed on.

Jim: What are you doing? Why don't you go on a date with her? Try to spark up an ongoing joke, and then in a month or two, if it feels right, you'll know.
Pam: You don't have to wait that long. I mean, you don't have to wait a month to ask her out. Just ask her.
Andy: You're asking him to give up all of his power.
Jim: What power?