Creed: Jimmy, listen to me, you do not wanna go to Amsterdam, trust me.
Jim: Where do I wanna go?
Creed: I'd send you to Hong Kong.
[aside to camera:]
Creed: I'd like to say hi to my friends in China. [speaking in Mandarin]

Dwight K. Schrute: Okay, you know what, this isn't working, because I'm not nervous in front of them. They're my subordinates.
Jim: No, we're not.
Dwight K. Schrute: Yes, you are. I'm assistant regional manager.
Jim: Which means absolutely nothing.
Dwight K. Schrute: Michael, can you explain?
Michael Scott: Well, it's mostly made up. So...

Kevin: I always set it at 69.

Michael Scott: Dwight gave a great speech. That's the word on the street, anyway. And I entertained Dwight to no end with my bar story. So I captivated the guy who captivated a thousand guys. Can you believe that? A thousand guys.

Jim: Can we not?
Michael Scott: No. Yes, we have to. You know why? 'Cause I don't like to be cooped up in that office. In that box, all day long. Heisman!

Jim: What did I do to deserve this?
Pam: Are you sad that Dwight beat you?
Jim: No.
Pam: Are you gonna cry, Jim? Do you need a tissue?

Michael Scott: So, you ready for the big speech this afternoon?
Dwight K. Schrute: Well, it's not really a big speech. You're still coming, right?
Michael Scott: Oh, abso-fruitly. Fruit, grapes. Nailed the joke. Matter of time.

Dwight K. Schrute: What if I give a really long, extended thank you, for instance, "Thank you, Mr. Blank. Thank you very, very, very"
Michael Scott: That would look terrible. These are mostly salesmen, and salesmen expect to be entertained and you are the main act.

Jim: [on the phone] Hi, yeah, can I talk to one of your travel agents? Where do I want to go? That is an excellent question. And one I probably should have thought about before I called you.

Michael Scott: As your leader and your friend, I sort of demand that you can all speak in public as I can, and did, twice. You saw the plaque, right?