Sue: You guys! You're supposed to be helping me with the party! You know what your jobs are, so do them!
Axl: [to Brick] Sisters, huh? [chuckles] She's crazy. Good thing we got each other. Right, bro? Come on, Brick. What do you want me to say? I can't rewind time. I can't undo what I did. I messed up. I'm sorry. Just be my brother again, all right? I can't be alone with these people.
Brick: [sits up] I don't play sports. I don't exactly have a ton of friends. I have books. You don't read. You don't understand. You don't know what it's like to live in different worlds, to travel on great adventures through the galaxy with people you know better than you know your own family, to live and die with them. Have you ever loved anything? Do you have any idea? These are my friends, Axl. My best friends in the world. You took away something from me that I can never get back. You took it, and you wrecked it.

Mike: Come on, Frankie. You- You never get tired and don't feel like talking?
Frankie: No. My husband calls, I pick up the phone. What if it had been an emergency?
Mike: Was it an emergency?
Frankie: No. For your information, I was calling to tell you you were cute.
Mike: See, that's the problem with cell phones. It's created a world where people call you just... with whatever thought pops into their head. What I do is, I actually remember the interesting things that happen during the day, and then I share them when I get home. If you think about it, that's... much more thoughtful.

Brick: Where's my book, Axl? I know you took it.
Axl: Hey! Until I see some proof, I will not even address these malicious and spurious charges! Law & Order. Watch it.

Brick: Please, Axl. Come on. Just... Just give me the book back.
Axl: Yeah, okay. [chuckles]
Brick: [exhales deeply] Thank you.
Axl: Professor Faxon has been dead the whole time.
Brick: [screams] No!
Axl: The Seventh Circle only exists in Professor Faxon's mind!
Brick: [screams] No!
Axl: Planet Nowhere is just Earth four million years ago!
Brick: [screams] No! [drops to the ground]
Axl: [gasps] Oh! Brick? I think I killed Brick!

Brick: T-minus one day until the Planet Nowhere book releases. Now that we're in the home stretch, I'll be switching to hourly updates.
Frankie: Brick, enough with the reminders. Your dad said he was gonna take you.
Brick: You're not the most reliable people. Oh, and don't forget my costume. I just need a furry hat and gloves that look like rocks. And obviously, of course, a pointy nose. Wouldn't want to look like an idiot.

Sue: Hey, Grandpa Big Mike.
Big Mike: What are you doing here?
Sue: Did you get my message about my parents' anniversary party?
Big Mike: Oh, I doubt it. None of my answering machines are working.
Sue: Oh, well, it's next Tuesday, and there's gonna be tons of speeches and toasts and stuff, and I was wondering if you might have some stories about them that you'd like to share?
Big Mike: No, thanks.
Sue: Really? What about the first time you met my mom?
Big Mike: Well... [clicks teeth] She seemed nice enough, and I said, "Are you really going to marry this guy?" And she said, "Yeah." And I said, "All right." [Sue chuckles] You looking for more?
Frankie: [v.o.] She was, but she wasn't getting it from Big Mike.

Axl: Why are we meeting in Mom and Dad's room?
Sue: Because this is the last place Mom and Dad would ever expect us to be. Oh! And by the way, we got nothin'. Our party is a disaster. The church is no longer available. Turns out they do Zumba Jesus on Tuesday nights. Grandma and Grandpa are on vacation. Grandpa Big Mike was a big "no." I told all of their friends to save the date, and none of them did! And have you and Brick written the skit yet? No. Of course not. So basically... we don't have anything! You know what? A lot of this is your fault. I really could have used Brick's help, but you broke him!
Axl: Well... he took my guitar. He brought this on himself. He had to feel my wrath.
Sue: Well, you know what? None of this is gonna stop me. Because Sue Heck does not give up.
Axl: Why not? If anyone should give up, it's you.
Sue: We are just gonna have to scale it down! Simplify. Work within our means. But it is still gonna be spectacular, and it is still gonna be super secret! So... lock it up! No mistakes! [hisses]

Sue: Axl, it is not funny! It's totally ruined, and that was my whole spaghetti budget! This whole party is a disaster!
Frankie: Oh, no, Sue. That's not true. This is really... very nice.
Sue: It is not! I know it's not! And it's because of you! We had a plan!
Axl: Whoa! It was never our plan. It was your plan.
Sue: It's 20 years. I wanted to make it special!
Axl: You always gotta do this! You always gotta make a big deal out of everything!
Sue: You do for family!
Axl: You know what you can do for family? Is give us all a break.
Sue: God forbid I try to do one fun thing!
Axl: You always try to do one fun thing, but it's never fun. Fine. Let's just get through it.
Sue: I don't want to get through it!
Frankie: Is this the skit?
Mike: She's got you down.
Frankie: He's doing you to a "T." [Frankie and Mike applaud]

Frankie: Hey. What is this? What are you doing?
Mike: [mouth full] Nothing. Just having a steak.
Frankie: Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Mike: Frankie, don't get all worked up.
Frankie: I just-- I mean, first the phone call, and now this... I don't believe this.
Mike: It's no big deal.
Frankie: Oh, it is so a big deal. So what? You just come here and eat steak? You just sit here and eat without me?
Mike: Yeah, sometimes.
Frankie: Sometimes? You've done this before?
Mike: It's quiet. I like it.
Frankie: So you're saying you can't enjoy yourself during the day?
Mike: No. Can you?

Brick: What's this?
Axl: It's a, uh... It's a new ending to Planet Nowhere that I came up with myself. [chuckles] So, you know, you can have, like, the experience you missed out on, or... something.
Brick: Really? You did this for me?
Axl: Mm.
Brick: Wow. This sucks.
Axl: Ha. Are you sure? Maybe you just didn't get it. You see, the entire planet lives inside the stomach of this ginormous dragon, and then when the dragon barfs it all up, it's just, like-
Brick: I-I get it.
Axl: Oh. All right.
Brick: You know, actually... there is a better way you can make it up to me.
[cut to Brick and Axl in their room:]
Brick: The problem is you've never learned to appreciate books. "Book one. Chapter one. Gallantra, The Mighty Dwarf. Beyond our galaxy, beyond our time, beyond our collective memory, there exists a planet of curious origin..."