Eleanor: Okay, executive decision: forget about Simone. Janet, make sure she doesn't come in contact with the other humans. Let's focus on Linda. We ought to be able to figure her out if we can just liven her up a bit. We'll just, like, sprinkle some cocaine on her peppermints or something.
Tahani: Does anyone else find it suspicious that the Bad Place sent someone so dull?
Eleanor: No, it makes perfect sense to me. They are trying to drive us insane by giving us a big boring glob of plain yogurt. Tomorrow morning, we start Operation Linda.
Michael: Okay, you heard the lady. We'll meet in the town square bright and early. Janet, set up for Flying Day.
Janet: Cool. I'm not busy or anything, so that'll be easy.

Michael: Linda, how are you enjoying the Good Place?
Linda: It's good.
Michael: Everyone's flying. You don't want to go flying any higher?
Linda: No, thanks.
Michael: Oh, well, okay. It says in your file that you like knitting. Would you like to do some knitting right now?
Linda: No, thanks.
Michael: Is there another activity you'd like to do now? You also enjoyed listening to birds. Man, Linda. You don't even look at them?
Eleanor: Let's go hear some birds. What do you say?
Linda: I'm gonna go get another peppermint.
Eleanor: Come on, Lins. You can have literally anything you could poss...
[Linda punches Eleanor in the face.]
Michael: What the...
[After Linda punches Michael in the face, she starts attacking people on the ground before taking off and attacking people in the sky]
Eleanor: Okay, so... Maybe she's less boring than I thought.

Michael: Whoa, slow down.
Eleanor: Did you put those trash cans there just so you could crash into them?
Bad Janet: That wasn't my fault, I was texting. Okay, let him go, dung buckets.
Michael: Nice try. We'll put him on the train and handcuff him to a bench. Yeah, forgive us if we don't trust you not to cheat again.
Bad Janet: Surprised you figured out that Linda was a fake, because we all thought you were too stupid.
Eleanor: Well, it was actually Tahani who got suspicious.
Bad Janet: Aww. That is so embarrassing for you. Seems like you're royally forking this up, just like we knew you would.