Dorothy: Ma, I guess we do have a good relationship.
Sophia: It's always been good. I know we never did some of those mother/daughter things: baking cookies, dressing alike, braiding each other's hair.
Dorothy: Yeah, but wasn't it great making fun of those who did?
Sophia: It sure was.

Dorothy: Oh, hi, Ma. How was your nap?
Sophia: Nap? I didn't take a nap. I'm a nervous wreck. How could I sleep a wink with this prison thing hanging over my head? Let's grab lunch.
Dorothy: Ma, it's dinnertime.
Sophia: Oh, I guess I did take a nap.

Dorothy: Look, we have to do everything we can to help Ma. Now, the three of us have got to put our heads together and try to figure out for certain how that fire got started.
Rose: You're so right, Dorothy. And we can start by ruling out the obvious. Does Sophia have any friends who are or ever have been circus fire-eaters?

Rose: Those stories made me hungry.
Blanche: They made me horny.
Dorothy: I'll tell you what. Why don't we call the pizza guy?
Blanche: See, we both win.

Blanche: Dorothy, maybe we should all get some rest and figure a way out for Sophia tomorrow.
Dorothy: Yeah, you're probably right.
Rose: Dorothy, can we look in on Sophia, too?
Blanche: She is like a mother to us.
Dorothy: I think she'd like that. Here's the key.

Blanche: I'm not saying I want her to go to prison. I'm saying if she goes to prison, we have the theme for the party.

Rose: Girls, do I have news for you.
Dorothy: Rose, where have you been?
Rose: Trying to get hold of the fire inspector who inspected Shady Pines. I wanted to double-check there wasn't anything wrong with the building.
Dorothy: And?
Rose: And get this. They said the inspector quit three days after the Shady Pines fire. It seems he mysteriously came into some money and moved to an exclusive Palm Beach neighborhood. Do you know what that means?
Dorothy: Rose, of course I know what this means.
Rose: Then will you explain it to me? It all sounded suspicious, but I couldn't quite piece it together.
Blanche: Rose, you nitwit, that means the guy was probably on the take.

Sophia: [singing] There's no one in the place except you and me. That's what we were singing that night. We were having a couple of Nyquil shooters and singing "One For My Baby." I remember.
Dorothy: Ma, you do?
Sophia: Yeah. I heard a smoke alarm, looked up, and saw flames coming out of the heater. Maria was confused. I grabbed her and the hot plate and ran out. It was the heater.
Herb Shrewsbury: Are you sure?
Rose: Sure I'm sure. It was the heater.
Herb Shrewsbury: You dig up that hot plate, Sophia, we'll go to the D.A. I think we've got enough evidence to get these charges dropped.
Dorothy: Ma, I am so proud of you. Now, honey, if you could just remember where you left the hot plate.
Sophia: I used it recently. Think, Sophia, think.
Rose: What's that smell? [alarm beeping]
Blanche: My God. That's the smoke alarm in Sophia's room.
Rose: Oh, no!
Sophia: Oh, yeah. Anyone for s'mores?

Blanche: Well, Sophia, how's it feel to be home?
Sophia: I feel like a free man.
Rose: Well, you didn't actually go to jail.
Sophia: OK, forget the free part. I feel like a man. I missed two estrogen shots, and I'm dying for a thick steak smothered in onions, a tall cold one, then going out and picking up a couple of-
Dorothy: Ma.

Dorothy: Oh, Ma, I'm just glad everything worked out. I never want to have to go through that again.
Rose: Oh, I knew it would all be OK.
Blanche: You know, Rose, I think you deserve a lot of the credit. You were the only one smart enough to double-check on that fire inspector.
Dorothy: Yes. I'm proud of you, Rose.
Rose: Hey, you make it sound like it's the only smart thing I ever did. I'll have you know I've done a lot of smart things over the years. Remember?
[Everyone stares off blankly into the distance]