‘You're Not Invited’
Season 1, Episode 20 - Aired April 8, 2014
Adam is looking forward to his first laser tag birthday party, but his plans change when Barry suggests he throw a make-out party in the basement so he can have his first kiss with Dana. On the night of the party, Erica turns into a full-on smother when she uncovers what's happening the basement. Erica tries to get Beverly to crash the party, but for once Beverly is trying to keep out of Adam's business. Meanwhile, Pops and Murray are excited to watch the opening of Al Capone's vault on TV, but Murray's happiness fades when Adam doesn't show any appreciation after Murray finally gives him a great gift for his birthday.
Quote from Adam
Erica: It's safe, mom. Laser tag's for little kids.
Adam: For your information, there are many adults that enjoy playing laser tag. I admit, they look kind of weird waiting on that single-player bench, with their desperate eyes just staring at you. Whatever! It's fun for everyone.
Erica: But mostly for dorky little kids.
Quote from Beverly
Beverly: Well, I'll never be a fan of lasers, but my scrumptious, little snuggle monster gets whatever he wants on his birthday.
Adam: I want you to stop calling me snuggle monster.
Beverly: Can't give you that.
Quote from Adam
Adam: So, I'll see you at laser tag?
Dana: Yeah. I hope I'm on your team.
Adam: I'll see what I can do, but no guarantees. There's gonna be two captains. Could get complicated.
Quote from Barry
Barry: Pathetic dude.
Adam: Like you could do any better.
Barry: Hell yeah, I could. Big Tasty knows how to tame the booty with the beat.
Quote from Adam
Barry: You gotta kiss her, bro.
Adam: I know. The timing just hasn't been right. I was busy, she was busy. Her family went to Sarasota. I had that cold and that Spanish quiz.
Quote from Barry
Barry: Pheromones, bro. Ladies love it. And we'll light some incense, then we'll deck it out with sexy accessories, like Moroccan pillows, lava lamps, and bongo drums.
Quote from Barry
Barry: And we serve the sexiest foods.
Adam: Go on.
Barry: Oysters. Soft cheeses.
Adam: Go on.
Barry: And onion dip. Nothing crunchy. Know why? Crunchy isn't sexy.
Adam: Wait, how do you eat onion dip if you don't have anything sexy?
Barry: Spoons! Spoons are sexy.
Adam: You obviously know what you're talking about.
Quote from Barry
Barry: And you got to wear something seductive, so go to the mall and buy the first velour clothing you see. That's the sexiest of all fabrics.
Quote from Murray
Murray: Adam's got a thing tonight.
Pops: A thing? It's his birthday party. Tell me at least you remembered it this year.
Murray: Ah, it's not whether or not I remembered. It's whether he thinks I remembered.
Adam: I don't think you remembered.
Quote from Murray
Pops: What was all that about? Did you not give him a gift?
Murray: It's not whether I got him a gift. It's whether he thinks I got him a gift.
Adam: I don't!