Geoff: Hey, Erica.
Erica: Geoff! Wow. This is so thoughtful.
Evelyn Silver: He really is. Aren't I the luckiest?
Erica: Yes, you are, 'cause you're dating, so obviously the wonderful bear is for you 'cause that makes too much sense, and they're gone.

Beverly: What your father is trying to say is we want the old Erica back, the one who'd fight with me and sneak out and steal my credit card and buy wine coolers and blame it on a hobo who lived in our walls.

Mr. Glascott: Well, my first intervention was a bust.
Beverly: Well, we tried your dumb thing, Andre. Looks like the only person who can fix Erica is me.
Mr. Glascott: Oh, God, no.
Andy: This is bad.
Naked Rob: Don't do that.
Murray: Why am I here?!
Beverly: Well, that settles it. It's time for the mother of all interventions. A "mothervention"!
Mr. Glascott: Damn it, that's good wordplay. Okay, she's got to get involved now.
Murray: Is this done yet? Can we go?

Beverly: Excuse me, sir. What time does this place explode into a disco inferno?
Bartender: When all the two-faced schmucks of this world admit that it's the music that shaped America!
Erica: I think that's jazz.
Bartender: It's disco, fool!
Beverly: The angry weirdo is right. Time to boogie the night away.

Adam: Barry, my handsome and powerful brother, I need your help.
Barry: Normally I'd punch you and walk away, but I gotta say I'm intrigued.
Adam: I joined the tennis team, and I need a doubles partner.
Barry: Becoming bored!
Adam: And I need your incredible gifts.
Barry: Listening again.

Barry: I'm basically Andre Agassi's twin. I even got the hair.
Adam: You definitely don't have the hair.
Barry: Don't I?
Adam: Was that just lying around?
Barry: Lainey likes when I wear it sometimes. Don't- Don't ask.
Adam: Wasn't going to.

Erica: Mom, I swear. Look me in the eyes. I would never lie to you.
Johnny Atkins: There's the girl of the hour. I'm RSVP-ing plus eight.
Carla: I'm bringing my stepbrother. We just got him back from this cult. He's so weird and cool.
Erica: Bro, everyone's welcome at my party. [to Beverly] I am so angry you don't trust me.

Coach Mellor: All right, everybody, I want you to join me in welcoming another Goldberg to the team. We're all very excited to have you here and also wondering what the hell you're wearing.
Barry: The style of champions. As my first order of business, I challenge Kremp and Kim for top seed doubles.
Chad Kremp: What?
Adam: You heard Big Tasty. Prepare to get Agassi'd, sucker. Sha-blammy!

Adam: Hey, this is Chad's fault. I only joined tennis 'cause he completely bailed on me.
Chad Kremp: Forgive me for not wanting to hang out with you on a Saturday night making cheesy videos.
Adam: Fine. Chadam Productions is hereby dissolved. We are no longer the Lennon/McCartney of home movies.

Mr. Glascott: Oh, my Lord! The students have started a spontaneous dance party without written permission. We have to put a stop to this.
Beverly: Not if it's supervised by a teacher who's also showing them some funky dance moves.
Mr. Glascott: You know what? You're right. Make a hole, kids. I got a case of Saturday night fever.