‘Rebranding’
Season 2, Episode 12 - Aired January 12, 2017
When the Cloud 9 instore product is rebranded, Cheyenne tries to get as much of the discounted old range as she can. After Jeff snaps at Dina, Mateo tries to warn him that the employees are talking about his behavior. Meanwhile, Amy and Glenn learn that Jonah is on a two year deferment from college.
Quote from Sandra
Sandra: Jeff and I have these cute nicknames for each other. He calls me "Deliciousness." [laughs] And I call him Mr. Man.
Mateo: Yeah, let's not forget she was blabbing to Jeff about us.
Garrett: Ain't nobody care about that.
Dina: Yeah, I'm just morbidly intrigued at this point.
Justine: Do you have sex in his hotel?
Sandra: Oh, yeah, all the time.
Dina: Is there a coffee machine in there?
Sandra: Yep, one of those pod ones.
Carol: Do they have decaf?
Sandra: I think so.
Carol: Yes!
Sandra: And you guys will keep this a secret, right?
Garrett: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, we got you, Deliciousness.
Quote from Amy
Amy: [to Jonah] You really want to be that guy?
Rex: Heated seats!
Amy: The nice suit, fancy car, big smile.
Jonah: I was never gonna go back. [sighs] I just...
Amy: Welcome to the "no options" club. But it's a cool club.
Jonah: Yeah?
Amy: Actually, I'm in it.
Jonah: Oh.
Amy: Most of America's in it. We meet on Tuesdays.
Jonah: Okay.
Amy: I'll get you on the email.
Quote from Dina
["Get Ready for This" by 2 Unlimited ends]
Jeff: Wow, that song is a little longer than I thought. What was that, 11 minutes? All right, anyway...
Jonah: 12.
Jeff: 12? Sorry about that. Uh, moving on, we have buttons for everybody to wear today, and there's a VP coming in to oversee this rollout.
Dina: A VP of corporate? I'm gonna need to borrow somebody's lipstick. Not Amy's... way too slutty.
Quote from Jonah
Man: Oh, excuse me.
Jonah: Yeah?
Man: Where is the Halo toilet paper? I could only find this stuff.
Jonah: Yeah, this is our new product line: the SuperCloud, and I have been ordered to tell you how excited I am about it.
Man: But I like Halo.
Jonah: Right, well, apologies, but we've actually shifted completely to SuperCloud.
Man: This is not a good time in my life for this. Rachel just broke up with me.
Jonah: I don't know who that is.
Man: I thought I knew who she was.
Quote from Jonah
Glenn: Hey, Cheyenne, can you go wake up this lady that fell asleep in Electronics? Last time I tried something like that, I got punched in the beans.
Cheyenne: Um, can I just buy some of this discounted Halo stuff for my baby first? It's normally so expensive I can barely afford her eye shadow.
Jonah: No, I-I'm telling you, they... they feel exactly the same because they are exactly the same.
Man: Well, let me at least try your belly.
Jonah: I'm not gonna... Fine, but just be careful. I'm ticklish.
Amy: Um, everything okay over here?
Man: Keep moving, I'm a Cloud Club Rewards Member. It's not a big deal.
Rex: Jonah?
Jonah: Rex?
Amy: Wait, I'm sorry, you know him? Yeah, we went to business school together.
Rex: Dude, what the hell are you doing here?
Man: Could you pull that up a little bit higher? Pull it up higher?
Jonah: I heard you.
Quote from Glenn
Jonah: Glenn, look, I'm not going anywhere anytime soon, but I can't promise that it's never gonna happen.
Glenn: Well, then, you're fired.
Jonah: What?
Glenn: Of course you're not fired. I love you!
Jonah: Okay, well, thank you.
Glenn: Do you love me?
Jonah: I'm sorry?
Quote from Cheyenne
Cheyenne: Oh, whatcha got there, Eugene?
Eugene: You would not believe the amount of stuff that gets misstocked here. Baby food in the barbeque. I found shampoo in jeans. I mean, who would do that?
Cheyenne: I don't know, probably some jerk or desperate mom or whatever.
Eugene: Yeah, well, I worked really hard rounding it all up. I stayed two hours past my shift, but I still...
Cheyenne: I'm all out of trophies, Eugene.
Eugene: That's okay. [sings] ♪ Life is fine at Cloud 9 ♪ ♪ Life is great...♪ Hello, sir! ♪ Work starts at eight ♪
Quote from Amy
Amy: Hey, sorry about before.
Jonah: Oh, that's fine. I can take a little ribbing.
Amy: Yeah, it went on for a really long time. Elias jumped in on it. He does a really good impression of you. It's like "Greetings, gentlemen." I can't do it.
Quote from Amy
Jonah: Look, uh, I just don't want you to think that I got one foot out the door, okay? I... I'm here, just like everybody else.
Amy: Mm... not just like everybody else. I mean, you can leave if you want.
Jonah: But I'm not.
Amy: But you can.
Jonah: But I'm not.
Amy: But you can, and that's the difference between being stranded on a desert island or going on a nice tropical vacation.
Jonah: You wanna think that, fine. I happen to think it's exactly the same.
Quote from Jonah
Jonah: [on the phone] Uh, hey. Hi. What's your name? Vicky! Uh, hey, listen, we are going to find a solution, Vicky. I don't need to calm down, Vicky. I wasn't raising my voice. Well, now I am.