Natalie: Where is he now?
Adrian Monk: He's playing a tournament in Vancouver. I've been following it.
Linda Kloster: That's right. He's in Canada until Tuesday.
Natalie: Well, at least you're safe until then.
Linda Kloster: Am I?
Adrian Monk: Mrs. Kloster, I have friends at the department.
Linda Kloster: Oh, I really appreciate that, Mr. Monk. But the police can't protect me. Patrick is smarter than all of them put together. My husband's gonna murder me. I'm already dead. And there's nothing you or anyone can do about it. Here's a check for $5,000.
Adrian Monk: I'm a little confused. If- If you don't think he can be stopped--
Linda Kloster: I'm hiring you to catch him.
Adrian Monk: You mean after?
Linda Kloster: That's right. After he's killed me. Mr. Monk, you are the only man smart enough in this world to make him pay for what he did. Or, rather, what he's gonna do.
Adrian Monk: I can't. I can't. I don't know what to say.
Linda Kloster: Say yes, Mr. Monk. Promise me. Promise me you won't let him get away with it.
Adrian Monk: I promise.

Captain Stottlemeyer: [on the phone] Kevin, it's a restraining order. You issue 30 of them a day. No, he hasn't hit her. Yes, she's still in the house. Because Adrian Monk told me, that's how I know. Fine, good. You do that. You sleep on it. Good. [slams phone repeatedly]
Adrian Monk: How'd- How'd that go?

Natalie: Mr. Monk.
Adrian Monk: Not now. Not now.
Natalie: You can't blame yourself.
Adrian Monk: Yes, I can.

Adrian Monk: What did the paramedics say?
Lieutenant Disher: Probable heart attack.
Adrian Monk: He killed her. He said he would kill her, and he did it.
Lieutenant Disher: Okay. Okay, there was no alarm. There was no one in the house, just the housekeeper and the cook. No signs of trauma or suffocation.
Adrian Monk: Poison.
Lieutenant Disher: No, housekeeper said she hadn't eaten all day, breakfast, lunch.
Captain Stottlemeyer: So how did he do it?
Adrian Monk: I don't know. I don't know.

Captain Stottlemeyer: What do you got?
Lieutenant Disher: You're not going to like it. The M.E. said natural causes, severe cardiac arrest.
Adrian Monk: What?
Lieutenant Disher: He's already released the body.
Adrian Monk: What- What about a complete toxicology workup?
Lieutenant Disher: He won't do it, Monk. Not without probable cause.
Natalie: But she was 42 years old.
Adrian Monk: What about the water? The tap water in the bathroom?
Lieutenant Disher: Checked.
Natalie: Well, how 'bout her lipstick?
Lieutenant Disher: We checked that too. I mean, toothpaste, even her eyedrops, everything in the house, It's all clean.
Adrian Monk: He killed her. He poisoned her. But how?

Journalist: Mr. Kloster, how do you feel?
Patrick Kloster: How do I feel? I'm still in shock. Linda was my reason for living. Thou detestable maw, thou womb of death, gorged with the dearest morsel of the earth.
Journalist: Where is that from?
Patrick Kloster: Look it up.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Patrick Kloster, I'm Leland Stottlemeyer, S.F.P.D. This is Lieutenant Disher.
Lieutenant Disher: Are you surprised to see us, sir?
Patrick Kloster: Yes, I am. I mean, I'm surprised to see you here. I expected you in Vancouver.
Lieutenant Disher: Yeah, well, we couldn't afford it.

Captain Stottlemeyer: We're sorry for your loss, sir. This is Adrian Monk and Natalie Teeger.
Patrick Kloster: Yes, of course. The legendary Mr. Monk. I was hoping to see you here. Hello.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Sir, we were wondering if you wouldn't come downtown, give us a statement.
Patrick Kloster: I'm afraid my schedule is rather tight, but I did take the opportunity of phoning ahead and reserving a room here at the airport security offices. It's nothing extravagant, but there is a table and five chairs.
Natalie: How did you know there'd be five of us?
Patrick Kloster: Please, Miss Teeger, don't insult me.

Lieutenant Disher: According to the Vancouver police, they interrupted the match at 1:21 p.m. To inform you that your wife had died.
Patrick Kloster: That's right.
Lieutenant Disher: And they said you kept playing, that you finished the match.
Patrick Kloster: Of course I did. That's what Linda would have wanted.
Captain Stottlemeyer: That's funny. I would have been too upset to concentrate.
Patrick Kloster: I was upset, Captain. That's why it took me 44 moves to win.
Adrian Monk: Your wife came to see me this morning, Mr. Kloster.
Patrick Kloster: Did she?
Adrian Monk: She told me that you had been planning to kill her.
Patrick Kloster: My wife was an unstable woman.
Adrian Monk: She didn't seem unstable to me.
Patrick Kloster: I'm sure she didn't.

Patrick Kloster: What did the medical examiner say?
Captain Stottlemeyer: Heart attack.
Natalie: She didn't look sick to me.
Patrick Kloster: And what medical school did you attend, Miss Teeger?

Patrick Kloster: My wife suffered from high blood pressure. And for most of her life, she was an alcoholic and a heavy smoker. She was also quite depressed.
Lieutenant Disher: And there was a $10 million life insurance policy.
Patrick Kloster: The policy was Linda's idea. I'm insured for the same amount.
Captain Stottlemeyer: What do you know about poison, Mr. Kloster?
Patrick Kloster: Not much. More than you, I'm sure, but not much. Although I am an expert on the poisoned pawn.
Lieutenant Disher: Poison-
Patrick Kloster: That is a chess move, Lieutenant Disher. I'd be glad to teach it to you if you'd like. Well, as you can imagine, I have a number of arrangements to make. Do you play chess, Mr. Monk?
Adrian Monk: A little.
Patrick Kloster: We should play a game sometime.
Adrian Monk: We already are.