Adrian Monk: What should I have done? Just let him lie to you?
Sharona: Yes. Yes. It was a first date. Taxi! Everybody embellishes their resume. It's called "human nature." Do you think I told him about Benjy? About that summer I spent dancing in Atlantic City? No.
Adrian Monk: What kind of dancing?
Sharona: I can't do this anymore. I quit.
Adrian Monk: Not again.
Sharona: No. No. I mean it this time. I'm sending my sister over for my stuff.
Adrian Monk: Okay, well, you know you're just gonna come back.
Sharona: Don't tell me what I'm gonna do. You think you know everything? Well, believe it or not, you don't know me that well.
Adrian Monk: All right. Let's just go back inside.
Sharona: No. No. It's too late. Look, I have responsibilities now. I got a kid. And I think I have to find a normal job before I go completely crazy.
Adrian Monk: Like me. Like me? Well, I'll never forget you.
Sharona: You never forget anything.

Sheldon Burger: Monk's been one step ahead of us all the way, but the man can't function without you. The city of San Francisco would be eternally grateful. These are really good. Did you make these?
Sharona: They're Oreos, Sheldon.
Sheldon Burger: They are?
Benjy: They say "Oreos" on them.
Sheldon Burger: Oh, yeah.
Sharona: Exactly how eternally grateful would the city be?
Sheldon Burger: You tell us, Sharona. Whatever you want.
Benjy: A skateboard track. Mom, make them build a skateboard track in the park.

Sharona: Okay. Here's the deal. I'll find Monk and bring him back, and you'll owe me one.
Sheldon Burger: One what?
Sharona: Someday there'll be a knock on your door. Whatever I say, whatever I want, you'll have to say yes.
Sheldon Burger: Within reason.
Sharona: Then forget it.
Sheldon Burger: Okay, okay, okay, not within reason.

Sharona: Come on. Let's go.
Adrian Monk: I don't know if I'm gonna be able to pull this off.
Sharona: Adrian, you're gonna be fine.
Adrian Monk: So, are you ever gonna tell me what kind of dancing you did in Atlantic City?
Sharona: Ballroom.
Adrian Monk: Really?

Sharona: Adrian, what are you doing?
Adrian Monk: It was dented.
Sharona: Where? You can't even see it.
Adrian Monk: I am what I am. Do you want it?
Sharona: Of course I want it. I'm not the mental case. [hits can] Oh, look this one's dented, too.
Adrian Monk: That's funny.
Sharona: I know. I don't know why you shop at that place, Adrian.

Adrian Monk: [reading] Chicago.
Gavin Lloyd: Uh, that's a confidential document.
Adrian Monk: Sorry.
Gavin Lloyd: That's why we shredded it.
Adrian Monk: Sorry.

Sharona: You know, Mr. Goodman, your painting is very, um.... I can't think of the word. It's...
Adrian Monk: Scary?
Jesse Goodman: I just got that piece. Something about it, I just had to have it.
Sharona: Yeah.
Adrian Monk: You can tell a lot about a person from his taste in art.
Sharona: [quietly] He did it.

Captain Stottlemeyer: Okay, boys and girls, the beat goes on. We gotta talk to that profiler again. Call the mayor. Tell him we're back at square one. [off Monk staring down] What?
Adrian Monk: Your shoes.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Yes?
Adrian Monk: They're all scuffed up, and they've got little creases in them.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Yeah, my shoes are scuffed up, Monk. They're not spotless like yours because I actually use them.
Adrian Monk: His were all scuffed up, too.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Call up SWAT. You go get in your car. Go. Go, go, go, go, go. Get him out of here. Go!

Adrian Monk: [to himself] Don't look up. Don't look down. Don't look up. Don't look down. Don't look up. Don't look down. Don't look...
Ian Sykes: [climbing down past Monk] Excuse me.
Adrian Monk: [stammering] You... You... You have the right to remain silent.

Captain Stottlemeyer: Now, let me get this straight. I'm confused, Monk. You say you want your badge back, is that right? You want your badge back so you can protect this city from rapists and murderers, as long as they don't climb any ladders or run across any big, bad, scary bridges. Is that right?
Sharona: Give him a break, Captain.
Captain Stottlemeyer: No, you give me a break. Look, you want to carry a gun? You're gonna carry a loaded gun and have other cops depend on you? No, I don't think so. You're off the case.
Sharona: Oh, bite me.
Captain Stottlemeyer: I'm sorry. What did you say? What did you say?
Adrian Monk: Leland, this isn't about what happened today, is it? This is about you and me. This is about you and me.
Captain Stottlemeyer: No, Monk, this isn't personal. The fact of the matter is the most-wanted man in the city got away because you got dizzy! Am I right? Don't expect the mayor to help you either, because after this, you're a leper.