‘Those Lazy-Hazy-Crazy Days’
Season 3, Episode 1 - Aired September 24, 2002
Lorelai is having strange dreams about Luke and has still not told her parents that Christopher left her again. Meanwhile, Rory is about to return from Washington and needs to make up her mind between Dean and Luke.
Quote from Paris
Paris: Now get in the closet.
Rory: What?
Paris: If he comes in here and sees you, he won't wanna date me anymore.
Rory: Paris, that's crazy! He's seen me. He's seen me for weeks.
Paris: Yes, in conferences, crowded lecture halls, badly lit banquet rooms with crappy food smells, not at night when it's dating time and he's thinking about dating and you're standing there looking all datable.
Rory: I'm not looking datable.
Paris: Please? I can't risk it. At least if there's nothing to compare me to, then I've got a fighting chance, please!
Rory: Okay, but when you get home, you need to get a new therapist because the one you have is really not working.
Quote from Paris
Jamie: So, shall we get going?
Paris: Oh, sure, sure.
Jamie: Do you like Italian food?
Paris: I love Italian food.
Jamie: Good. I've made a reservation at a great place. Well, at least, that's what the Zagat guide says.
Paris: You're perfect.
Jamie: Let's go.
Quote from Sookie
Sookie: For over the mantelpiece. It's perfect!
Lorelai: It's a dead fish.
Sookie: It's an antique stuffed and mounted trout, and I think it's manly.
Lorelai: Oh, please!
Sookie: It is! I think it's very Ralph Lauren.
Lorelai: Sookie, Jackson loves you. You're not seriously telling me the future of your marriage depends on Leon Troutsky over there.
Quote from Lorelai
Lorelai: Hey, I got you gifts.
Rory: What? I'm the one that left town, I'm supposed to get you gifts.
Lorelai: Oh, but I got here early and there was nothing to do except feed gummy bears to the bomb-sniffing dogs which, apparently, the United States government frowns upon.
Rory: You got in trouble with the government while you were waiting for me?
Lorelai: Just a little.
Rory: How much is a little?
Lorelai: Learn Russian.
Quote from Lorelai
Lorelai: Okay, here you go.
Rory: Wow, a Hartford, Connecticut sweatshirt.
Lorelai: Nice, huh?
Rory: Hartford, Connecticut notebook, Hartford, Connecticut pencil set, a Hartford, Connecticut shot glass.
Lorelai: And beer mug!
Rory: Hartford baguette, Hartford bear, a Hartford sunglasses.
Lorelai: You like?
Rory: I love.
Quote from Lorelai
Lorelai: All right, let's go. We'll get your bags, then we'll hit the road, and I can't wait to hear all about Washington. And, by the way, I got you out of dinner with the Gilmores tonight. I thought you and Dean might enjoy a little Peaches and Herb time together.
Rory: Oh, thanks. What'd you tell 'em?
Lorelai: That you get home tomorrow.
Rory: Big fat lie.
Lorelai: Yes, which proves how much I love you. The fact that I was willing to lie to my own parents who I never lie to just so you could have a night of happiness is proof positive of my deep undying devotion that I have for you.
Rory: I appreciate that.
Lorelai: And all that devotion can be yours for the low, low price of $29.95!
Rory: Forget it.
Lorelai: Okay, I'll throw in a set of steak knives.
Rory: My bags, please?
Lorelai: Are you telling me that you want this gesture of love for free? What kind of world are you living in?
Quote from Lorelai
Rory: I can't believe I'm home. I feel like I've been away forever.
Lorelai: I agree.
Rory: Hello living room.
Lorelai: [high-pitched voice] "Hello Rory, we missed you." Not the ottoman, of course, but everyone knows he's a snob. Napoleon complex, he only really likes the magazine rack.
Quote from Lorelai
Lorelai: Hey Rory, I don't want you to freeze out your dad because I am.
Rory: I'm not.
Lorelai: 'Cause I'm fine if you wanna go back to the way things were.
Rory: I think that would be a little hard this time.
Lorelai: Okay, maybe not now, but eventually.
Rory: Eventually, maybe, but for now... solidarity sister.
Lorelai: Ya-ya!
Rory: You've been waiting for six weeks to do that, haven't you?
Lorelai: Ya-ya!
Quote from Lorelai
Lorelai: Okay, so, do we do cheese stick, hot dog, cotton candy, or do we mix it up a little, start with the cotton candy and end with the cheese stick?
Quote from Rory
Lorelai: Okay, who kissed who?
Rory: What does that matter?
Lorelai: Because it matters. Did he kiss you, did you kiss each other, did you trip and your faces accidentally...
Rory: I kissed him.
Lorelai: Okay.
Rory: And I don't know, I thought he came back here because he liked me or something, and I kissed him and he kissed me back, and now he's over there and I feel so stupid and... that girl isn't even his type and...
Lorelai: Rory, what are you doing?
Rory: What do you mean, what am I doing? I'm ranting. You should recognize this, I learned it from you.