Rory: [phone rings] Do not talk. We're going to be late.
Lorelai: I talk fast. It's my gift.

Michel: [on the phone] My friend Tessa just called and told me she has front-row tickets to Celine Dion, and I'm going with her.
Lorelai: Well, that's great.
Michel: I have been waiting forever to get this close to Celine. Oh, my god, I'm shaking like a leaf. What should I wear? What would Celine like me in?
Lorelai: I don't know, Michel, but I'm on my way to pick you up, so-
Michel: Oh, no. Don't bother. I'm not going to the wedding.
Lorelai: What? Why not?
Michel: Because I'm going to Celine Dion. Hello! What have I been saying to you?
Lorelai: No, Michel, you have to go to the wedding.
Michel: Sorry, I cannot.
Lorelai: Well, you've already seen Celine Dion.
Michel: Only five times, and never in the front row. I was in the balcony with the riffraff and the people who sneak in pot.

Lorelai: Well, if we can't drink, might as well go get something to eat.
Rory: That food is not for you.
Lorelai: What? Hold on. Is this the "not married" thing again? Did you tell them I'm engaged? Engaged has got to be worth a spare rib.

Mrs. Kim: Well, all my guests are gone. I'm going home.
Lane: Are you sure?
Mrs. Kim: Yes, I'm very tired. I'm going to go home and go straight to bed.
Lane: Okay.
Mrs. Kim: I'm going to wear earplugs tonight - the good ones that expand in your ears - so I won't be able to hear anything that might be going on out in the street at all hours of the night.

Kirk: I have to ask you something. Do you think he's yummy enough?
Rory: Who?
Kirk: Troy.
Rory: The bartender?
Kirk: Yes. See, I put this company together for the sole purpose of bringing truly yummy bartenders to the lonely women of Stars Hollow, but they really have to be yummy. I'm talking mouth-watering, tasty morsels of manhood. Which, by the way, was the original name of the business, but it was already taken by a firm in Woodbridge.
Rory: Really?
Kirk: Yeah. Now, when I first met Troy, I thought he was the epitome of yummy, you know? But now I see him in the moonlight, I'm not so sure.
Rory: Oh, I wouldn't worry about it, Kirk. I think Troy's plenty yummy.

Lorelai: Let me see the picture.
Rory: No, you'll delete it.
Lorelai: Not if it's good.
Rory: You erase every picture I take of you.
Lorelai: No, only the ones where I look like Rhoda.
Rory: You never look like Rhoda.
Lorelai: Occasionally, I look like Rhoda.

Rory: Hi, everyone, I'm Rory Gilmore. I'm the maid of honor.
Lorelai: To Rory!
Christopher: To Rory!
Rory: I'm not one for speeches, and I don't have any incriminating pictures of Lane to share, but I do have this letter. This letter was written in 1995 by one Lane Kim. It was slipped into my hands during a spelling test in Miss Mellon's class. I was so shocked by its contents that I missed the word automobile-- o-t-t-o-mobile. That's right, Lane. I remember. I will now share with you the contents of this letter. "Dear Rory, how was your lunch? Mine was bad. Did you have ham again? If you did, I am sorry, but mine was worse. I thought you should know that today at recess I decided that I'm going to marry Alex Backus. He has a very nice head, and his ears don't stick out like Ronnie Winston's do. I will love him forever, no matter what. See you at brownies. Love, Lane." I just thought that Zach should know that in your heart, he will always be second place to Alex Backus and his well-proportioned ears.
Lane: It's true.
Rory: But the bottom line is, I love you, Lane. Congratulations. To the bride and groom.

Lorelai: Hello. Everybody, hello. Some of you know me as Lorelai Gilmore, and some of you know me as Cher. But either way, I wanted to say a few words about our girl. I have known Lane forever, and I'm just so incredibly happy that she has gotten married. I mean, I am just so happy that this adorable 22-year-old girl has gotten married, because it's amazing, you know? It's really hard to get married. Believe me, I should know. I mean, seriously, because Lane is married, and next thing, it'll be my daughter, and then my granddaughter, but not me. I'm not getting married. No, it ain't for me. It's not in the cards. But, hey, do you know what date I'm not getting married? June 3rd. Do not save the date. Do you hear me? Do whatever you want on June 3rd, because there's nothing at all happening on that day. If there's anything you need to book or anything, it's totally safe to book it on June 3rd. So, congratulations, Lane and Zach. Who else here had eight shots of tequila? Anybody? Hands... no? Oh, my gosh, who misses the yummy bartenders? I know, me too. They were so great. I was gonna ask them to not work on June 3rd on my not wedding. I just thought that would be so fun. Hi, Chris. Hi, Rory. Hi.
Rory: How about some coffee?
Lorelai: What? Okay. Well, I guess we're going over here.

Christopher: Man, I must say, when your mom does something, she commits.
Rory: Just prop her up. I'm gonna make some coffee.
Christopher: Hon, if the two gallons we poured down her throat at the wedding didn't do anything, I'm not sure what two more cups will.
Lorelai: Hey, no one knows how to wrangle the powers of coffee like a Gilmore. Just prop her up. She hates to get pillow face.

Lane: Boy, there's a lot of activity down here.
Mrs. Kim: It's going very well. Your aunt Joon is a wizard with the kimchi.
Lane: Well, is there anything I can do to help?
Mrs. Kim: No, go back upstairs. Read the bible passages I've underlined.