Lorelai: [on the phone] Wow, congratulations.
Rory: It's a pretty amazing opportunity.
Lorelai: Yeah, sounds like it. You'll be having lunch with the off-bet editors from the Times. Hanging out with Peter Jennings. Dan Rather will be valet parking your car.
Rory: Yeah, it's more likely that I'll be pulling wire reports off the AP machine, but sure.

Logan: [answers phone] Hello?
Rory: Listen. You're going to be getting a note from the Gilmores sometime soon. Maybe in the mail, maybe hand delivered tonight. For all I know, a carrier pigeon is heading for your room as we speak. You might want to open your window.

Lorelai: I think internships are a Communist plot.
Richard: What?
Lorelai: Forcing someone to work without pay? It's a little Pinko, isn't it? I mean, where's Roy Cohn when you need him?
Emily: Have you lost your mind?
Lorelai: No, no. It's still sloshing around up there.

Rory: [on the phone] I am not returning the blue sweater again, so don't think about asking.
Lorelai: But I want it, I need it.
Rory: I've already returned the Capri pants twice. I've tried to return a couple of your other items that were all sales final, which makes me look retail simple. And this is not the first, but the second time I will have returned the blue sweater.
Lorelai: Ooh, the Capri pants. Have you taken those back yet?
Rory: I can't show my face in any stores in New Haven. They think I'm Paper Mooning them.
Lorelai: Oh, she was very cute in Paper Moon. You're very cute, too.
Rory: Calling me cute is not going to persuade me. And I have classes. A life.

[Lorelai dials the phone and is rendered speechless when she hears her mother's voice:]
Emily: Hello? Hello? Who are you looking for? Did you dial the wrong number? You know, it's very rude to dial someone and then just sit there on the phone without so much as a grunt or a moan. I mean, as far as perverted phone calls go, this is a very poor one.
Lorelai: [sighs] Mom, hello.

[Lorelai and Rory are on the phone with each other as their Roombas clean both of their rooms:]
Lorelai: So is this more or less fun than watching the same T.V. show at the same time?
Rory: I think it's more.
Lorelai: You know, if we died right now, and decomposed, it would vacuum us up and no one would ever know.
Rory: Freaky.

Rory: What are you thinking about?
Logan: Whether or not you've ever woken up with Paris standing over you with a knife.
Rory: Not recently. She's been in a good mood.
Logan: Why is that?
Rory: Because she's in love.
Logan: With Doyle?
Rory: Yes, with Doyle. And do not mock or make fun, because when Paris is happy, the whole world is happy. But when she's not happy, the whole world is Deadwood.

Rory: I want to look professional but not too Lois Lane-y, and I don't want to look like a college kid.
Logan: You are a college kid.
Rory: Not on Monday. On Monday, I am a newspaper woman. And I have to look like a newspaper woman.

Rory: Tennis lessons? That sounds great, Grandma.
Emily: I've always liked tennis. And I have to say, I'm excited by the prospect of getting some good, healthy exercise.
Richard: I'm excited by the prospect of those fetching tennis costumes.
Emily: Richard, not in front of Rory.
Rory: Oh, I'm fairly worldly now, Grandma.

Emily: Richard, it's already been a week.
Richard: We need to invite him right away.
Rory: Who?
Emily: Logan. The ball's been dropped.
Richard: I'll put an invite in the mail first thing tomorrow.
Emily: We really should have had him over first. We probably should call him as well.
Richard: We could messenger it in by tonight, it isn't even eight.
Rory: Well, it's really nice of you to want to have him over, really, but you don't need to.
Emily: Rory, if you could mention it to him yourself, preferably tonight, I'll get a note over to him tomorrow.
Richard: He'll need a choice of dates.
Emily: I'll get my book.
Richard: I'll get mine, too.