‘The One with the Fake Monica’
Season 1, Episode 21 - Aired April 27, 1995
When Monica's credit card is stolen, she's more bothered about the exciting life that "Fake Monica" is living. After Monica joins her identity thief at a dance class, she quickly befriends the conwoman and gets a taste of a more carefree lifestyle. Meanwhile, Ross is saddened when he learns he must give up Marcel.
Quote from Chandler
Joey: Plus, you know, I think it should be Joe. You know, Joey makes me sound like I'm this big: which I'm not.
Chandler: Joe, Joe, Joe Stalin?
Joey: Stalin. Stalin. Do I know that name? It sounds familiar.
Chandler: Well, it does not ring a bell with me.
Joey: Joe Stalin. You know, that's pretty good.
Chandler: You might wanna try Joseph.
Joey: Joseph Stalin. I think you'd remember that.
Chandler: Oh yes. Bye Bye Birdie, starring Joseph Stalin. Joseph Stalin is the Fiddler on the Roof.
Quote from Phoebe
Rachel: Monica, okay? Honey, you're kind of losing it here. I mean this is really becoming a weird obsession thing.
Phoebe: This is madness. It's madness, I tell you. For the love of God, Monica, don't do it. Thank you.
Quote from Joey
Joey: I don't know what to say, Ross. It's a monkey.
Ross: Just say what you feel, Joey.
Joey: Marcel, I'm hungry.
Quote from Chandler
Monica: You've got to do something about the humping.
Ross: What? It's just a phase.
Chandler: Well, that's what we said about Joey.
Quote from Rachel
Rachel: Marcel, stop it. Marcel. Bad monkey!
Ross: What?
Rachel: Well, let's just say my Curious George doll is no longer curious.
Quote from Joey
Ross: She says Marcel's humping thing is not a phase. Apparently, he's reached sexual maturity.
Joey: [to Chandler] Hey, he beat you.
Quote from Monica
Monica: How'd someone get your card number?
Monica: I have no idea, but look how much they've spent.
Rachel: Monica, would you calm down. The credit card people said you only have to pay for the stuff that you bought.
Monica: Still, it's just such reckless spending.
Ross: I think when somebody steals your credit card, they've kind of already thrown caution to the wind.
Quote from Monica
Monica: I mean, I could do all this stuff. Only I don't.
Rachel: Oh, Monica, come on. You do cool things.
Monica: Really? Let's compare, shall we?
Rachel: Oh, it's so late for "shall we."
Monica: Do I go horseback riding in the park? Do I take classes at the New School?
Rachel: No.
Monica: It's so unfair. She's got everything I want, and she doesn't have my mother.
Quote from Rachel
Monica: I'm going to tap class.
Rachel: So that you can dance with the woman that stole your card?
Monica: This woman's got my life. I should get to see who she is.
Rachel: Go to the Post Office, I'm sure her picture's up.
Quote from Rachel
Monica: Do you see anybody you think could be me?
Instructor: People, last time there were empty yogurt containers lying around after class. Let's not have that happen again.
Rachel: She could be you.