Monica: Hey, did you stop by here?
Rachel: No.
Monica: Oh, my God. Then- Thank God! Emma, there you are!
Rachel: What? What do you mean, "there you are"? Where was she?
Monica: We were playing peekaboo. She loves it when I'm dramatic.

Joey: It's unacceptable that you'd have sex with Emma in the next room. I'm going to have to tell Rachel about this.
Chandler: No, no.
Monica: Please don't. She will kill us.
Joey: Hey, I gotta. Unless-
Monica: Unless what?
Joey: Unless you name your first-born child Joey.
Chandler: What? Why?
Joey: Hey, I may never have kids and somebody's gotta carry on my family name.
Chandler: Your family name is Tribbiani.
Joey: ... Oh, ha, ha. You almost had me.

Phoebe: Now wait a minute. So they're gonna name their first child Joey? How do I get them to name the next one after me?
Joey: It's easy. You just walk in on them having sex.
Phoebe: Oh, so they owe me, like, three Phoebes.

Joey: Can you believe they're still not here?
Ross: I know. A double blind date and we both get stood up. What are the chances?
Joey: I know, I'm so bummed. Could we have our free crab cakes now?
Waiter: What?
Joey: We've been stood up. And we want our free crab cakes.
Waiter: Guys, give it a rest. Nobody's betting on you tonight. Although we do have a pool going to see how long it takes that guy to cry.
Steve: I have such fat hands!

Phoebe: Oh, they see us. Oh, they look mad. Oh, they figured it out. Oh, they're coming this way. Run!
Joey: Where?
Phoebe: Mexico!

Rachel: Joey, it's so great to be back here. I gotta tell you, you're making it so easy on me and Emma.
Joey: Hey, it's great having you back. Stay as long as you want. And when does she stop crying all night?

Rachel: But she's in the bedroom, all ready to go. But she fell back to sleep, so-
Joey: She's probably exhausted from all that adorable screaming she did last night.

Ross: I just want you to know that with Rachel staying here all my feelings from before are totally over, okay. And even if they weren't when you walk in on a woman using a breast pump-
Ross: Yeah, that'll do it.

Ross: Anyway, I think Rachel and I need to get on with our lives. Maybe start seeing other people.
Joey: Wow. Really?
Ross: Yeah. Sure, why not? In fact, if you know anyone that'd be good for me?
Joey: Sure. I know lots of girls.
Ross: Yeah. Any names come to mind?
Joey: Ooh, names?

Joey: I was about to get something to eat. Want something?
Phoebe: What you got?
Joey: Okay, let's see, we got strained peas, strained carrots, ooh strained plums. We haven't tried that yet.