Ross: You know, if I didn't already have a job I think I would've been really good in advertising.
Monica: Ross, you did not come up with: "Got Milk?"
Ross: Yes, I did. I did. I should've written it down.

Ross: You mugged me?
Phoebe: Yeah. And I'm so, so sorry, Ross. I'm sorry. But, you know, if you think about it, it's kind of neat. I mean, well, it's just that I've always felt kind of like an outsider. You know, the rest of you have these connections that go way back and, you know, now you and I have a great one.
Ross: It's not the best!

Lowell: All right, lady, now give me your purse.
Phoebe: No.
Ross: What do you mean "no"? I knew you'd be my death, Phoebe Buffay!

Leonard Hayes: What the hell are you still doing here?
Joey: Oh. Uh. ... I think you know.
Leonard Hayes: Bastard.
Joey: I am what you made me. You know what? I could go right now.
Leonard Hayes: Go! Go!
Joey: I can't. Oh, I want to, Long Pause ... but I can't.
Leonard Hayes: So sorry. You're not supposed to say "long pause".
Joey: Oh! Oh, I thought that was your character's name. You know? I thought you were, like, an Indian or something, you know, with the...

Phoebe: What's your news?
Chandler: Thank you. I got a job in advertising.
Monica: Honey, that's incredible.
Phoebe: Gosh, what's the pay like? Oh, come on, people. If I don't know who makes the most how do I know who I like the most? Hi, Joey.

Phoebe: Okay, I think we have a problem here.
Monica: What?
Phoebe: Well, back in my mugging days, you know, I worked St. Mark's Comics.
Monica: Yeah?
Phoebe: Well, a pipe was my weapon of choice and preteen, comic-book nerds were my meat.
Monica: So?
Phoebe: Well, there was this one kid who had a sticker on his backpack that said: -
Monica: "Geology rocks!"
Phoebe: "Geology rocks!"
Monica: Oh, my God.
Phoebe: I know. I mugged Ross!

Leonard Hayes: That was very good. You did everything I asked for.
Joey: I did?
Leonard Hayes: Yes. Plus which, you've got this, I don't know, this squirmy quality that you bring to the character I couldn't have even imagined. Wow. Hey, here's what we're gonna do: Come back tomorrow for the final callbacks with the backers. Do all of this, what you got going now, but you know what? More.
Joey: More?
Leonard Hayes: Can you do that?
Joey: Sure. Sure. I don't have time to say thank you because I really gotta go!
Leonard Hayes: Look at that. Still in character. I like him. I plant seeds. I can't explain it.

Ross: So what kind of stuff do you think they'll have you do there?
Chandler: Well, it's a training program, but at the end they hire the people they like.
Phoebe: That's great.
Chandler: I mean, there's probably gonna be some grunt work which will probably stink. You know, a grown man getting people coffee is humiliating. [to Gunther] Humiliating and noble. Thank you.

Joey: Where's Chandler? I want to wish him good luck on his first day. And I smelled bacon.
Monica: He just left.
Joey: Who did?

Joey: He's done some amazing work.
Rachel: Oh, yeah. I loved him in those cell phone commercials.
Joey: I know. When the monkey hits him in the face with the giant rubber phone-
Monica: Hey, maybe the monkey will be at the audition.
Joey: Don't make me more nervous than I already am!