‘The One with Ross's Tan’
Season 10, Episode 3 - Aired October 9, 2003
Rachel and Joey nervously try to spend their first evening together as a couple. Meanwhile, Monica and Phoebe seek to avoid an obnoxious old friend, and Ross has a spray tan disaster.
Quote from Chandler
Ross: Oh, and it gets worse.
Chandler: Oh, my God, you can do a duet of "Ebony and Ivory" all by yourself.
Quote from Ross
Ross: Wait a minute. There's two sets of nozzles! Which one is it? Which one is it? [tanning machine sprays] Oh, son of a bitch!
Quote from Chandler
Chandler: Dude, it's Chandler. Let me in.
Ross: Go away. I don't wanna see anybody.
Chandler: I know. I went to the tanning place and the same thing happened to me. You have to let me in.
Ross: Really? Did you count Mississippi-ly? You're not tan.
Chandler: No. I just had to get a picture of this. I'll see you later.
Quote from Phoebe
Monica: And she always bragging about all the famous people she's met.
Phoebe: Oh, I know! "I slept with Billy Joel." All right, who hasn't?
Quote from Ross
Tanning Salon Guy: All right, Mr. Geller, right this way. So how dark do you wanna be? We have one, two or three.
Ross: Well, I like how you look. What are you?
Tanning Salon Guy: Puerto Rican.
Ross: Two. I think a two.
Quote from Chandler
Chandler: Hello? Is someone on the line?
Amanda: Yes. I was looking for Monica.
Chandler: Hang on, she's right here. Someone's on the phone for you.
Monica: We weren't picking up. It's Amanda.
Chandler: [to Amanda] I get pedicures.
Quote from Joey
Joey: I'm sorry. This has never happened to me before. I'm an expert at taking off bras. I could do it with one hand. I could do it with my eyes closed. Once I just looked at one and it popped open.
Quote from Joey
Chandler: So you and Rachel tonight, huh?
Joey: Yeah. Yeah, it's actually our first official date.
Chandler: Wow, so tonight may be the night. You nervous?
Joey: No. This is the part I'm actually good at.
Chandler: What must it be like not to be crippled by fear and self-Ioathing?
Joey: It's okay.
Quote from Ross
Ross: Well, how bad is it?
Tanning Salon Guy: Not that bad yet. But it keeps getting darker for the next four hours.
Ross: So how dark is it going to get?
Tanning Salon Guy: You got sprayed with two twos and-
Ross: I'm a four?
Tanning Salon Guy: Yeah, but your back's a zero. You're gonna wanna even that out.
Ross: Really?!
Tanning Salon Guy: You might wanna get back in there.
Ross: Oh, okay!